Tuesday night on Channel 7’s Border Security, there was a segment about an American guy who came over from the USA to meet his online girlfriend in Melbourne. He got detained in Sydney because immigration officials deemed that he was carrying too little money (approx. USD$100) to sustain his stay of 2 weeks.
Anyway eventually he was allowed to fly on to Melbourne because the girl (sweet Chinese girl) told immigration officials that she was willing to partly fund his stay in Australia. The story was: they’d met 2 years before and one year ago they started talking on the phone. And now he was here. The irony of it all is that after enduring a somewhat tough interrogation by the immigration officials and being delayed for a few hours, he left and went back to the USA 4 days after meeting up with the girl.
What I got from the story? Sometimes, somethings are better left in fantasy land. Was it too much expectation from both of them - the reality just couldn’t match the fantasy they had in their minds? Possibly. I think that by choosing to meet each other for real, they had deprived themselves of the emotional connection that they had in the first place and would still have if they had maintained the relationship online. In the end, was losing that worth it?
Given a similar choice I have to be honest to say that I’d be hard pressed to make a decision. I wouldn’t really know what I would do. Would I have chosen the Red Pill and confront reality? Or would I have chosen the Blue Pill and stay in fantasy land? Is the ultimate truth worth the pain? And what’s to say that fantasy is all that bad?
Is ignorance truly bliss? Providing everything else is fine with your life, if you are happy being ignorant what harm does it do? And what gives others the right to take that happiness away? Isn’t life about being happy anyway?
It’s a complex dilemma - I really wouldn’t know what I’d choose.
7 Responses to “Red Pill vs. Blue Pill”
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Yes fantasies can be sinfully be indulging, but they’re just that - figments of the imagination. I think it’d be a bit sad, to look back on life and wonder what if - as cliched as it sounds.
That said tho, it probably would have worked out better if both parties didn’t have any expectations, save for friendship. Maybe if they just treated it as a friendship, the online emotional connection will be realised as something tangible.
I think starluvvy makes a good point that it would have worked out better if they didn’t have any expectations.
It’s think it’s good to have a healthy balance of red and blue pills myself.
starry/miss L: yeah I think to expect a “real” relationship out of what they have build up may have been a little too much.
If it was only meant to be just a friendship, the chances of them remaining so after meeting up for real would have been better.
There’s just been so many cases of ‘online’ love that did not work out. Yet again, there’s been many cases of people who met online actually still liked each other in real!
I’ve personally encountered both , and it’s a 50-50 chance that you’ll have to take.
Then again, love is a 50-50 chance.
BUT, I do think that you can never really know until you’ve actually met. There is something about humans and expressions on their faces that is just so important.And if you never try,you’ll never know.
I’d go with the Red in cases of love…a healthy dosage of skeptisim is needed sometimes
sourrain: your nick - which one shall I refer to you as: honeypot, mili or this?
Anyway yes facial expressions and physical appearance counts for a lot. That’s a cold hard fact. I’d go back to the notion that if they only wanted a friendship it might’ve worked out. Though as you’ve said, if they were looking for love better that they find out now than later.
I’d never look for love online because I’m too skeptical. Even that one time where I met a girlfriend through the net, I wasn’t looking for it.
I said I wouldn’t know what decision to make and that’s true but I wouldn’t put myself in that situation to begin with.
There is no reality and fantasy it’s all just parallel realities.
The relationship online was as ‘real’ as the relationship in the same physical location. It just worked differently.
It was the change from one type of relationship to another that didn’t work. Sometimes you can’t tell that till you try the change
I myself have screwed up many a friendship for the potential of love.
The good thing is, in the long run you find someone who you can maintain the friendship and love with
m: good point. same thing but on a different “plane”.
Lucky those that made the change worked for them.