I’m having one of those work days. Everyone needs something done “urgently”. I tell everyone who said that to me today that:

Everyone’s been telling me that today.

Do they care? Not really. So I say back,

It’s in the queue. I’ll get to it when I get to it. You just have to wait your turn.

Then they would grumble grumble grumble and walk away. Yeah bitch, you are pissed but you can’t do anything about it because I know your PASSWORDS! Muahahaaha. Don’t piss me off because I’m the SYSTEMS ADMINISTRATOR. *ahem*

Meanwhile here’s a gem from Overheard in the Office:

Boss: Did you find that receipt?
Underling: No, it’s not in the receipt file. I checked every receipt for the last six months. It’s not there.
Boss: Why don’t you look again?
Underling: I knew you’d ask, so I looked twice already. It’s not there. Is there somewhere else that you put receipts?
Boss: No, only the receipt file. But if it’s not in there, it’s not a big deal. Later today, if you have time, why don’t you look again in the file?
Underling: Okay, but if it’s not there now, it won’t be there later.
Boss: Yeah okay, but why don’t you just look again?

1028 East Private Road 1200 North
Farmersburg, Indiana

Hilarious™! Well not really because I have and I’m sure *you* have dealt with bosses like that too.

This, ladies and gentlemen is one of many reasons that I like going to The Deen so much. The door bitch is HOTT. Ok so she may not be a real blonde and she may be artificially enhanced but I’m a guy. If it’s aesthetically pleasing to my eye, I don’t care.

The Screwy Skeptic wrote about being Asian but not quite accepted as one. Specifically, to non-Asians she’s Asian but to an Asian, she’s not “fully” Asian. From her post:

For 15 out of my 19 years I have not lived in an Asian country. Naturally, an identity struggle is inevitable. I cannot for the life of me hold a conversation in Mandarin, but I love all sorts of Chinese music. I cannot discuss intricate matters of Asian politics with you from a nationalistic insider’s perspective, but I do know my history. I cannot say I’ve been on more than one date with an Asian boy, but I am not opposed to the idea of ever dating one (should he fit all the usual criteria, of course). I’m a hyphen, just trying to find a decent balance that I so require.

This topic of living in a non-Asian environment while being expected to maintain your Asian “values”, speech and behaviour was covered quite well in Clara Law’s “Floating Life“. The metaphor is that migrants float from their homelands to their new home but remain floating even after they’ve arrived - neither here nor there.

I for one enjoy floating because I get to see and do more than I would have, had we remained in Malaysia. And I have been lucky to have been able to maintain my language skills in Mandarin, Hokkien and Cantonese. But in the end language skills to me are not as important as knowing and accepting your cultural background whilst embracing that of those around you in the new environment.

What’s really Asian anyway? We are all a rainbow of colours and influences.

Technorati Tags: Asian identity, culture, migration

Play-humps a meter maid in public, in broad daylight, in front of cameras, and surrounded by body guards. It doesn’t get any more surreal than that with a world leader. Kinda reminds me of Boris Yeltsin, except Yeltsin was usually drunk. Berlusconi is sober. Italians and their machismo. Heh.

Link to Wonkette - with YouTube video of course. (stumbled upon via MetaFilter)

A 2-parter about sex and learning about it whilst growing up. (Part 2 is here)

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I don’t remember having ever wondered “where do babies come from?” In my mind, I always assumed that babies came out of nowhere. Not quite delivered by the stork but more like an immaculate conception, not that I knew what the heck that meant at the time.

I always assumed that when a mommy and a daddy (how quiant) decided to have a baby, the mommy’s tummy would just automatically grow and grow until out pops a baby. And everyone would be happy until the little worm started hogging all the food and attention … RAWR!

Fast forward to my 10th birthday. I remember it vividly because I got a children’s encyclopedia as a birthday present. And why would that be memorable? Well because there’s a section about human biology in it with pictures and description of the entire procreational activity. It was only then that I understood the mechanics involved: you put this in there and you go in and out a couple of times. Not quite in those words, but it was as dry as that. And I only knew the mechanics and nothing else. Meaning I knew nothing about kissing, oral sex and all that. That was to come later.

Still, the concept of sex was bizarre to me. I never talked to my parents about it. But when I was 12, my dad dropped a little magazine the size of a Reader’s Digest on my table.

Here you go. It’s about sex.

… and promptly walked out of the room. I guess that was his attempt at the “father and son” talk. It was surreal - the magazine was from the early 70s and was indeed about sex, diseases and the sexual politics at the time with illustrations but not photos. However, it was mind-blowing nonetheless.

Before long, I discovered my dad’s stash of porn magazines - JACKPOT! They had only pictures of naked women in them though. Guess he didn’t like looking at penises more than any guy would. No matter. BOOBIES! Woohoo!

And the girls at my mom’s boutique were always reading these trashy romance novels. One day I wondered why would anyone wanna read stuff about love and all that so I picked one up and flipped through it. Woah, SEX SEX and more SEX!

Heaving bosoms, throbbing manhoods and being “inside”. I couldn’t get enough. I was addicted. I was sneaking reads at the bookstore or at the shop when the girls were serving customers. And funnily enough they never thought anything of it.

Aw, how sweet. You like romance.

Ch-yeah, what would a 12-yr old know about sex. All this before I hit puberty. I was a fiend even before I knew what a fiend was.

Technorati Tags: sex, sex education

I have known Brenjane (BJ) and Thamanoon (Noon) since I was 16 (1990). Thamanoon and I went to the same high school, Applecross Senior High and Brenjane was from Santa Maria in Attadale. As were the norm in those days Noon and I met BJ at the local city library through some other friends of ours.

Back in those days when there wasn’t IM, or mobile phones the only way to meet ppl was to meet them in the flesh. And we’d meet at the library because the buses stop at a central station nearby.

While I was close to Noon, him and BJ were closer. When we parted our ways for uni, I still kept in touch with Noon and it was through him that I got reacquianted with BJ again in 1999. It was from then onwards that us three became a tight group.

Towards the end of 2000, BJ left for Indonesia to teach English and Noon left not long after for work in Japan. It was then that we really appreciated the technology: emails and mobile phones really help us felt that we weren’t apart at all. They were also what I’d call “low maintenance friends” - we don’t have to talk everyday but when we do, it’s like we were never apart.

After approximately a 2-year stint for the both of them, they came back for a little while before they headed off again. This time to Sydney. And ironically, I was told by the both of them that they talk more to me these days than to each other, and they are living in the same city no less. It didn’t really surprise me because I was always the one who’d organised our get togethers and back in the day we’d see each other at least twice a week.

It’s been almost 16 years that we’ve known each other and what I have with them is really one of those things that I’m so glad that I’m alive for.

Here are some photos taken when we went playing with our cameras in Kings Park, Perth sometime late in the year 2000.

From the link below:

Labor leader Kim Beazley last week put internet pornography back on the agenda saying Labor, if elected, would force ISP’s to offer a “clean feed” internet service to Australian families.

The clean-feed plan pioneered in Britain by BT was based on a simple blacklist of sites and could be set up without seriously slowing the net, Mr Beazley said.

Ah but Mr. Beazley, any kind of filtering would slow down our net access. It’s a simple law of physics - stick something in front of something else, and it’s gonna slow that something down. The other ludicrous part of this proposal is that those who wanted unfiltered access would have to sign up for it. Hello!? Get our names on a list that will let the self-righteous brand us as perverts just because we like watching consensual adults doing it?

Privacy issues aside, what gives the moral and religious zealots the right to judge the rest of the citizens in this country?

I’m glad that Helen Coonan, the Federal Minister for Communications and IT sees the futility of such a filtering system.

Senator Coonan yesterday told the Senate that the Government would continue to investigate the technology used in ISP filtering.

However, until the system was found to be effective and that it could be installed without degrading internet speed for all users, the Government would retain its policy of encouraging families to use PC-based filter systems, she said.

Too right. Controlling what children sees on the Internet is the sole responsibility of the parents. That’s the problem with some parents in this country - blame everyone else but themselves for their rotten kids. To you fucktards: Quit expecting the government to bring up your kids and be a better parent. Otherwise, stop having babies. And to you politicians trying to get these fucktards to vote for you: fuck off. I will watch porn whenever and however I want to because I’m an ADULT.

I’m so glad that Kim Beazley has a snowball-in-hell chance of being elected into government.

Australian IT - Pressure builds for censorship (James Riley, MARCH 28, 2006)

Technorati Tags: Australian, politics, censorship, IT