Why don’t Aussie girls date Asian men?
because he snagged a white woman
Got your attention? The title is taken from Sam de Brito’s post on his SMH blog “All Men Are Liars“.
With such a provocative title, his post was bound to get a load of comments. At last count, there were 425, mostly from Asian males and Anglo females as expected. It took me an hour to wade through the first 300 or so. If you want to go and read the post and the comments first, go ahead. We’ll wait for you.
The rest of you, follow me …
Let’s get a few facts out of the way to set the mood right for this post:
- Yes, I know Asian-Australians are “Aussies” too but in this context, it will mean its traditional connotation of white Anglo-Saxons. And Asian will mean “East Asian” or yellow-skinned Asians, and yes I know Asia is a big place with many different-coloured people.
- I’ve never dated an Aussie girl but I would like to. Having said that, I don’t resent the fact that it’s harder for me as an Asian guy to date a white girl, than it is for an Asian girl to date a white man.
- And generally, I don’t “aim” for Aussie, Asian or whatever. I do aim for a nice and caring person. Date the person, not the race right?
To answer the question in the title, I will explain it from my point of view. To me, there are two big aspects as to why you wouldn’t see that many Asian male and Aussie female pairings: cultural, and physical.
Cultural
As a Chinese person, I am very family-centric. My family will always come first before anyone else. This thinking guides a lot of my behaviour which some Aussies probably wouldn’t understand. And when there’s no cultural connection, it’s that much harder to make an emotional connection.
However being family-centric is also a reason why I get along with Italians and Greeks, and to a certain extent, the Irish famously. In a way, our families behave very much the same. Unfortunately, all the nice Italian/Greek/Irish girls that I’ve met were never available.
In some of the comments, Anglo girls bemoan that they would like to date an Asian guy but they never get approached by them. Again, this is a cultural thing. Aussie men are more gung-ho and more willing to stick their neck out in a bar or club situation. Make a fool of yourself? Who cares!? However, Asian men don’t want to “lose face”.
Most times I don’t approach a strange girl (any girl, not just Aussies) unless I already know her and there’s a spark. This commenter echoed my sentiments.
I’m a Korean and my girlfriend is Anglo. I would absolutely approach white girls if I got to know one in a work/educational/recreational environment, but to be honest I probably wouldn’t try to pick one up in a bar scene where I would be entering the fray with no idea what she was like, and vice versa.
Why? Well I guess due to the rarity of mixed race couples where the male is Asian and the girl is Anglo, I’ve started to assume that white girls wouldn’t be interested in me, and would bar me from the get go. As I said, if I got to know a white girl first in one of the aforementioned settings and I thought there was a bit of a spark, nothing would stop me from having a go, but I wouldn’t approach one at random in a pub.
Tofuloaf at October 17, 2006 10:40 AM
Physical
All women would like their men taller and bigger. Asian men are generally smaller and shorter, sometimes too small or too short for a typical Aussie girl. I’m 5’4″ (164cm) and 60kgs. Therefore, the pool of white women for me to potentially date is that much more limited.
No point crying about it, it’s reality. Just like how most men would prefer a woman with a curvy body, there’s nothing wrong with having physical preferences.
In the comments, there are Anglo women who proclaim that they prefer Caucasian, rather than Asian features in a man. This is the same for Asian women who’d date Anglo men exclusively. Again, it’s a preference rather than a racial thing.
There was also the obligatory mention of penis sizes in the comments. Yes we are smaller, but we can still rock the boat quite well thank you very much.
Conclusion
In general it is true that the majority of Aussie women would date within their own cultural background, but that is true for people of all other cultures in this country. One tends to stick with what one knows and feels comfortable with.
in “The Dragon”
However there are many exceptions like the sons of Bing Lee of the electronics chain in NSW, and prominent Sydney neurosurgeon Charlie Teo. In my family alone, there is one male cousin who’s only ever dated white girls, and another about to marry one.
Personally I don’t think of it along racial or cultural terms at all. It’s all highly superficial and preference-based anyway. Even if the Asian guy is as ocker as they come, that doesn’t necessarily make it easier for him to snag an Aussie girl if she prefers a white fella physically.
So no, I don’t stress too much over how come I don’t get to date a white girl. Instead, I stress over how come I don’t get to date a girl, any girl at all! 
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357 Responses to “Why don’t Aussie girls date Asian men?”
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Most Asian males are NOT interested in white females, but white males are attracted by Asian females, now you see why WM/AF is much more than AM/WF, everywhere!
However, white males used to think both white & Asian women like them because they’re more attractive. Western movie and media, always portrait Asian men are rats, white men are hero by Caucasian male directors, reflecting their lack of confidence, jealous and insecurity of losing women’s love. Simple!
It is easy to tell if someone find you attractive enough to like you or not. Just look at them in the eye and smile when you see them on the street or in the city. If they like you, they will smile back and hold the eye contact. If they don’t like you or find you repulsive, they would look away or make a face that looks like they are out of breath. Easy. From my experience, some Anglo white girls in Melbourne do smile back in a shy way, but the golden rule is they have be shorter than you or at least your height. While others are simply not interested and never bother to look your way (your presence is not felt, dating asian never quite crossed their mind). But if you say hi, they are polite enough to say hi back to be nice. As for the Mediterranean white girls, I feel there’s a racist vibe from them towards ethnic non white men. I was at the Greek festival today, and I must say that most Greek women would not date asian man what so ever. If you try to even look at them, they will act like they are too good for you and just tell you to piss off in their eyes. Some even make the look that they find you repulsive for no explanable reason other than your ethnic non white race. Italians are generally more polite. To make matters worse, one day I went running in my neighbourhood, I said ‘good afternoon’ to a Greek looking white old woman, not only did she ignored me, but she made a face that told me she despised me. The same face that I would get from some young white Greek girl.
hi i am an aussie chick and i kinda have a thing for asian guys but most of my friends find it weird but i dont care. i was wondering what an asian guy looks for in a chick i hear they like long hair but i have very short dyed red hair
When I was leaving Penang to Melbourne for my study in 1965 my parents remind me again NOT to come home with a Aussie wife
Hee hee…
I am asian young man and I like Aussie girls very much but sometimes I feel Aussie girls won’t like me because I am asian man. Can Aussie girls advices me please?
Another observation I’ve made with Caucasian girls that are decendants of British or German immigrants in Australia. The one’s who are more economically well off from affluent families with the higher education (ie studied commerce working in the large corporates) tend to prefer asian guys only as a friend and would rather consider dating caucasian men who had higher educated and who works in the corporates and on average has higher salary and position than asian men. Since White men are the top of the game in the corporate world. Whereas for caucasian women working in education, trades, small family businesses and other non flashy careers, or without a job, dating an asian men with a better career and higher education would be a more accepting idea maybe? I think my conclusion is that caucasian women are mostly just like asian women in the sense that they would prefer their men to be in a better financial position and social station than they are on average. While some asian men have flashy careers, but in Australia, the people who top those flashy careers are mostly white men. So if a white woman is also in that flashy career, asian men would be a less attractive date.
As a young Aussie girl, I personally prefer Asian men. It is not a racist thing, I just find myself dating Asian men and truly caring more about them than I usually would with a white/Caucasian man. Asian men seem to be much more family orientated and are much more aware of their physical appearance than white men, which are things that I look for in a guy. But that is just a generalisation and (of course) does not apply to all Asian men. And to all the Asian guys who are asking how to approach us, it really is quite simple. Make eye contact and smile. If we smile back we think you’re cute and you can come talk to us. It works the other way too, so smile back if you think we’re cute! Haha! One other thing – i am openly curious as to what makes asian guys think we’re cute – any suggestions? Thanks!!!
Good luck to everyone! 