Why don’t Aussie girls date Asian men?
because he snagged a white woman
Got your attention? The title is taken from Sam de Brito’s post on his SMH blog “All Men Are Liars“.
With such a provocative title, his post was bound to get a load of comments. At last count, there were 425, mostly from Asian males and Anglo females as expected. It took me an hour to wade through the first 300 or so. If you want to go and read the post and the comments first, go ahead. We’ll wait for you.
The rest of you, follow me …
Let’s get a few facts out of the way to set the mood right for this post:
- Yes, I know Asian-Australians are “Aussies” too but in this context, it will mean its traditional connotation of white Anglo-Saxons. And Asian will mean “East Asian” or yellow-skinned Asians, and yes I know Asia is a big place with many different-coloured people.
- I’ve never dated an Aussie girl but I would like to. Having said that, I don’t resent the fact that it’s harder for me as an Asian guy to date a white girl, than it is for an Asian girl to date a white man.
- And generally, I don’t “aim” for Aussie, Asian or whatever. I do aim for a nice and caring person. Date the person, not the race right?
To answer the question in the title, I will explain it from my point of view. To me, there are two big aspects as to why you wouldn’t see that many Asian male and Aussie female pairings: cultural, and physical.
Cultural
As a Chinese person, I am very family-centric. My family will always come first before anyone else. This thinking guides a lot of my behaviour which some Aussies probably wouldn’t understand. And when there’s no cultural connection, it’s that much harder to make an emotional connection.
However being family-centric is also a reason why I get along with Italians and Greeks, and to a certain extent, the Irish famously. In a way, our families behave very much the same. Unfortunately, all the nice Italian/Greek/Irish girls that I’ve met were never available.
In some of the comments, Anglo girls bemoan that they would like to date an Asian guy but they never get approached by them. Again, this is a cultural thing. Aussie men are more gung-ho and more willing to stick their neck out in a bar or club situation. Make a fool of yourself? Who cares!? However, Asian men don’t want to “lose face”.
Most times I don’t approach a strange girl (any girl, not just Aussies) unless I already know her and there’s a spark. This commenter echoed my sentiments.
I’m a Korean and my girlfriend is Anglo. I would absolutely approach white girls if I got to know one in a work/educational/recreational environment, but to be honest I probably wouldn’t try to pick one up in a bar scene where I would be entering the fray with no idea what she was like, and vice versa.
Why? Well I guess due to the rarity of mixed race couples where the male is Asian and the girl is Anglo, I’ve started to assume that white girls wouldn’t be interested in me, and would bar me from the get go. As I said, if I got to know a white girl first in one of the aforementioned settings and I thought there was a bit of a spark, nothing would stop me from having a go, but I wouldn’t approach one at random in a pub.
Tofuloaf at October 17, 2006 10:40 AM
Physical
All women would like their men taller and bigger. Asian men are generally smaller and shorter, sometimes too small or too short for a typical Aussie girl. I’m 5’4″ (164cm) and 60kgs. Therefore, the pool of white women for me to potentially date is that much more limited.
No point crying about it, it’s reality. Just like how most men would prefer a woman with a curvy body, there’s nothing wrong with having physical preferences.
In the comments, there are Anglo women who proclaim that they prefer Caucasian, rather than Asian features in a man. This is the same for Asian women who’d date Anglo men exclusively. Again, it’s a preference rather than a racial thing.
There was also the obligatory mention of penis sizes in the comments. Yes we are smaller, but we can still rock the boat quite well thank you very much.
Conclusion
In general it is true that the majority of Aussie women would date within their own cultural background, but that is true for people of all other cultures in this country. One tends to stick with what one knows and feels comfortable with.
in “The Dragon”
However there are many exceptions like the sons of Bing Lee of the electronics chain in NSW, and prominent Sydney neurosurgeon Charlie Teo. In my family alone, there is one male cousin who’s only ever dated white girls, and another about to marry one.
Personally I don’t think of it along racial or cultural terms at all. It’s all highly superficial and preference-based anyway. Even if the Asian guy is as ocker as they come, that doesn’t necessarily make it easier for him to snag an Aussie girl if she prefers a white fella physically.
So no, I don’t stress too much over how come I don’t get to date a white girl. Instead, I stress over how come I don’t get to date a girl, any girl at all! 
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357 Responses to “Why don’t Aussie girls date Asian men?”
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Should I judge Australians on the individual level or their collective group thinking and perception of an Asian male?
Am I whinging by pointing out their racist attitudes and oppresive nature towards minority? If I don’t speak up, would they notice?
Do you want Australia to change for the better?
You should judge people on individual level, on their singularity. If you start to judge them on a collective level, it is called racism. The answer to racism is not racism or anti-racism, it is to be intelligent, to think.
The idea of Australia and its demographic components are dynamic. The composition of Australians from 20 years ago is different from now, and will be different in 20 years. Don’t forget that more than 65% of Australians in this decade were born oversea. Thus Australia is already changing. Don’t make it change in a bad way by whinging…date the one you love.
@kim
Look, I understand it’s about market acceptance and I understand there are some asians in the American media but those are just very very few exceptions and most of the asians you’ve listed are well, just that, they’re stars for asian reasoning. Some asian male stars like BD Wong in Law and Order and John Cho have made themselves known without being stereotyped with some of the programs in their careers. Majority of the American entertainment industry won’t allow asians (regardless if they’re female or male) to have leading roles. Again, if you’re going to counter my argument, don’t give me those exceptions, because they’re very very few.
-Why do I care about Hollywood and TV and Do entertainment (the industry of emptying people’s mind) define who you are as an American Asian?
Quite frankly I don’t care what these filmmakers and advertisers do, they’re only in it for the money. However I do care when the characters in movies are assuredly asian, but some filmmakers won’t allow it. Just look at the recent controversial films like The Last Airbender, Dragonball Evo, 21, etc, are these filmmakers saying asians particularly the males not bankable? The leading stars in The Last Airbender other than Dev Patel were unknown. Financial discrimination is still discrimination and if we ignoring this, we’re not helping the cause at all for better representation of asians. Even asian filmmakers like Dragonball Evo director and M Night, are not helping at all, they’ve actually made things worse. All they’ve done was get people riled up and angry.
-Why do you need Western Societies or what ever society’s approval to date anyone?
I come from a predominately white neighborhood where I was teased, pushed, tripped, spit on, in schools, public events etc, which is understandable because they’re not used to seeing asian people. But let me ask you this, were you ever questioned based on your race whenever you were out on an event? I was at a friend’s wedding (my friend is white) and there was a little kid (10 or 11 yr. old, white) kept saying Jackie Chan is here. Now I’m flattered he thought I was Jackie Chan, but still, if Jackie Chan is his only image of an asian person, what does that say about American society? I’m not trying to put down my neighborhood, I’ve had mostly good than bad times.
@Kim
I guess what I’m trying to say about Hollywood is, even though I get tired of stereotypes in American movies, I rather see stereotypes than none at all.
Hi Ken,
Thank you for your answer. Actually I think you said it all. It is about market acceptance, and the same logic is used in HK, Korea, China, Japan, Bollywood or Nollywood.
I can tell you that you are an American by your answers, you share the anglo-saxon common “naive” belief that your freedom would come from the political or economical system if you change it.
Unless you are an actor or someone in the entertainment industry, why would you care about changing an industry that sells shit on screen? The best thing we can do is just not to pay to see those visual diarrhea.
? Anyway, it can’t really stop you from dating the right person…
Culture wars are just stupid, they did not work; gays, women, latinos, blacks just got differently stereotyped in “Hollowood”, it will be the same with asians. As simple as that, Hollywood is an industry of mental brainwashing, for propagating myths because people don’t have time to talk to their neighbor or to read books. It is the same with porn, it is a fabrication, an alternative reality where all men have big penis and all women have big boobs and are horny, as real as cops always win and lonely women in cities get to have what they want from men.
There is no place on Earth where you would not be discriminated. Even in Asia, they would call you “banana”. Same thing happens to all of us, white, black, yellow, brown, we all have these kind of stories. I was swimming in “Central Coast”, Australia, when a little white boy with a ring buoy asked me if I was coming from China, I replied I was coming from the moon… Discrimination is what makes you singular, you can always transform it to your advantage with a good sense of humor, it’s when discrimination becomes an ideology, a political system that things get dangerous…
Maybe Hollywood is a racial birth control mechanism for white people
A very good film to watch: “Gattaca”…
@Kim
The reason I care what the American entertainment industry does is NOT because I think they’re brainwashing people, it’s because filmmakers and people who help them (and get this many of them are asian agents) are benefiting from discrimination, why would you not care? I understand there are no place on earth where it’s 100% fair, but discrimination has been going on for years (Hollywood is notorious for that) and I do work in the film industry. I’m an independent filmmaker myself, I just don’t understand why people like yourself would not voice your opinion. Filmmakers like Just Lin, Fred Weintraub, filmmakers of Harold and Kumar and Ninja Assassin are trying to represent asians and we need to be supporting these filmmakers. And no I’m not trying to sound pathetic by blaming the media, I just think people who are helping them (even asian people) are actually causing the problem by making people riled up and angry. I’m not sure if I’m allowed to link a forum here, but there is a site called youoffendmeyouoffendmyfamily.com. that argues about what I’m talking about. Just google “why we don’t need more asians.” Again I’m not disagreeing with you, you sound like a thoughtful person, and I get asked where I’m from too but I am just saying, we all need to work together whether you are asian, black, hispanic/latino, white, etc and try to move forward and not backwards. I remember John Cho said in an article that things have gotten better for asians in movies and tv shows, but they’re not where it should be.
Hi Ken,
I understand your problem. You are in the entertainment industry and one of your concern is that the industry doesn’t want to go where you want to go. Well it is the same thing for every creative industry. That’s why we fight every day, to push our ideas!!!
It is not that I don’t voice any opinion about the entertainment industry, it is just that I don’t see the racial representational issue as the main problematic in cinema and in any creative industry. For me racial issues are minor issues, especially in cinema, where the aim is to create a global representation of realities or fictions. Race or identity are not the only things that define the world, they are constituent, elements of a mosaic of systems, they are particularities.
My advice is for you to make a project on your obsession. It is the best thing you could do to support your ideas about discrimination. Whinging doesn’t help an artist. Now, my opinion for your industry is that Borat or Bruno were far more subtile or daring than any Michael Moore documentaries…Even if they share the same goals or political satire. Humor works better than bullying people into your world….It goes the same way with relationship, I suppose.
Thank you for your website, I’ll have a look.
@Kim
Agreed.
My apologies if I sounded blunt with my first comment, I was just being half sarcastic and half telling the truth.
Jason, I’m a white female Australian, and I just want to ask you a few things: you say that most girls won’t go out with Asian guys because they are racist? Well, like it or not, perhaps the discrepancy of white guys dating white girls and not the other way around has something to do with the fact that… I don’t know… white guys are asking out Asian girls?
Who do you usually hang out with in any given week? Is it your Asian friends? How many non-Asian girls have you struck up a conversation with this week, or this month? How about your friends? Have they tried the approach of simply aiming to make friends with girls, expanding their social group to people that are not Asian? This is just my observation, but Asians tend to be very cliquey and generally hang around most Asians. So you can either have an inferiority complex or you can grow a pair and expand your social horizons. If white guys are “stealing” your Asian girls, then please, steal white girls like me from them! I think you’d find more open minded girls at a library or anime convention than at a club though. Most people who go to clubs are superficial (and yes, I admit they probably would judge you that you’re Asian) but they are only looking to get laid anyway. But hey, if that’s your thing, eventually you’ll find a girl that’s into both Asians and a good time.
Whatever you’re looking for, whether it’s a one night stand or long term relationship, you’ve just got to put yourself out there, and show people that it’s not a big deal that your Asian, and they won’t be bothered either!
If Asian girls choose to be in relationships with white guys, frankly, it’s their business, not yours. Only THEY know how compatible they are, and love goes beyond surface compatibility. You are only judging from the outside, and maybe when you fall in love with someone with a different background than you, you will understand. Both combined Eastern and Western values can be a lovely thing.
What Kim was saying about the bogans is true. Don’t listen to anything that bogans say. They are socially backward and the retards of Australia. They may say they are just being a true blue Aussie, but they aren’t.
As for Asian, and other minorities being represented in Australian media, I agree, there should be more leads given to Asians and other racial minorities. If everybody looked the same we’d get tired of looking at each other, as the song goes. And Australia is growing more racially diverse by the day. It would be great for an Asian-Australian to be given a lead role in a movie, or better yet, a TV series such as Packed to the Rafters, to show that Asian people to live in Australia too, and are just as Australian as anyone. Besides, we all know that white people all look the same, and it’s getting a bit boring looking at them.
What I really mean is that it would be refreshing to have some more racially diverse actors.
However, one thing I have noticed from watching US TV (more specifically NBC Today that’s on Seven Mate in the mornings, and reading O magazine, the one where Oprah is on the cover of every issue) is that it’s like “oh an advertisement, there’s the token white, token black… now where’s the token Asian? oh there they are. That’s most races covered that we need to cover.” So it feels a bit contrived where a third of the models are roughly split between black, white and asian models, when it’s not really a proportionate representation of races. But, overall, I think it’s a good thing.
Anyway, there are a lot more white women who would be willing to date Asian guys. In Eastern culture a subtle approach to dating is normal, but the trouble may be is that it doesn’t translate as well in the West. White girls just don’t pick up on the signals, or we expect a more direct approach. Also, I understand that not only do you have to take a risk and go outside of your comfort zone to talk to a girl that isn’t Asian, but you have the negative or even asexual stereotypes to contend with. BUT the good thing about Aussie girls, (not the type at a club or bar), is that we are down to earth and friendly. Just talk to us goddamit! We need to up this Asian guy/white girl ratio a bit.
@Rachel
Honestly, I’ve given up trying and want to focus on my Internet startup and move to California. Lets just say I rarely mix with Asians in my last 5 years in Sydney and wholeheartedly reach out to meet Aussies from all background. It is the ‘token’ white Aussie who would not even see me as a friend. While I find it easy to chat up and flirt with European girls. You can’t imagine the hotties I befriended (English, Spanish, German). One is a yoga teacher and she is a blonde bombshell. We catch up for lunch often. She isn’t single unfortunately. But the same type blonde bombshell born and bred in Australia? She is up herself and does all the stereotypical thing you would expect. Not interesting at all. No independent mind to think outside the box and truly become an individual.
My point is the bogan culture here means that 99% of Aussies share the same mindset. The rest (perhaps you)… Lets just say I have to go through 99 rejections to reach you. With such odds, I’m better off moving to a new place with greater acceptance. For myself, Sydney is a great disappointment. Other people may find happiness here, good for them. Deep down I feel oppressed and I will do something about it.
My dreams, my personality, my ambition. It just doesn’t fit here. Long ago I know I will not get far in the corporate world. Luckily I have a lot of faith in my creativity, ambition and resilience. My perception of Australia may not be the same as the rest of you. But if there is anything I trust, I trust my gut instinct most. Something doesn’t feel right here.
Racehl:Somtimes, I feel like some white women are interested on me and I guess they will talk to me if i approach them. I used to have a crush on a white women who worked near my workplace,and I just know from her colleague that she wanted to make friend with me but she thought that I had no interest on her because I did not have any eye contact with her or try to start up conversation with her.
Shyness is really a big obstacle to meet women,especially with different culture background.
We always try to check you out when you do not realize that so that you do not know we have interest on you girls:P,looks like white girls may take a more active approach,eye contact,smile or talk….
I’m sorry to hear about your experiences socializing with white, Aussie women, Jason. I really don’t have an explanation for you why the white women you encountered were so stuck up. It really is their loss for them to be so closed minded. You have only lived in Sydney, right? I know that Sydneyans can be a bit closed simply because there are so many people, much like New York.
Ron, you only live once, so if you really want a white girlfriend, just take the leap and smile and start up a conversation. See where it leads you. I do understand that it would be easier if girls did take the initiative to talk to you first, but unfortunately, in Western culture, and I’m sure in Eastern culture too, the males are meant to pursue the females.
@Rachel
I can’t imagine white Aussies in other states being friendlier when they’re not in Sydney. Like comparing a New York and some other cities (say Portland). New York would have more diversity and be more accepting.
The difference is Americans acknowledge racism exist and they then deal with it openly:
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yuFy_qjolU&feature=youtu.be&a
In Australia, there is feminism and all kinds of -ism but there is NO racism. But historically, there are plenty.
This resonates with me the most. Very relevant if you want to move Australian society forward…
http://eurasian-sensation.blogspot.com/2010/08/bit-about-asian-men-and-white-women.html
The people who are claiming Australia is 20 years behind and backward are seriously annoying me. It’s disrespectful, it is a form of racism (from when Australians were “backward” criminals”) and it’s a sweeping generalisation. Obviously, there are more people in Britain and the US that can be dated. + I’ve heard racism from people who have come from Europe, including rural areas of Britain. This idea presented in the international media that Australia is a racist country is as true as saying that every country in the world is a racist country. I’ve experienced racism overseas and I know it’s not something that’s just isolated to Australia. There may be different mainstream cultural values in Australia.
There is family from my grandparents generation who were married and lived happily and were from China. Most of the people I knew in high school dated outside of their race, including me. In fact, with the vast number of bi racial friends and fellow students, it was really difficult to tell exactly what race someone was from or what race is….Even someone who looks Caucasian may have an Asian or Aboriginal parent ^_^`
+ Dating was not because someone has ‘always been attracted to a certain race’ and wanted to try them out like some kind of fashionable handbag or a shiny toy, but because of love for the person as an individual.
There are other factors which may motivate Australian women to be cautious of who they date. When dating an Australian woman, the dating culture may be a little different. It’s not a racist outlook, but culturally, there is a perception of Australian women “policing” sex. The male peruses (so gets more sexual freedom to seduce someone) and the female polices herself (decides when she will be allowed to be seduced).
If you look up the harassment/ sexual assault case on Insight SBS, then you can see this viewpoint being stressed.
If something goes wrong, there is a chance that the girl will be branded a “slut”, hurt, stalked, harassed, beaten (could be a case of domestic violence or jealous psycho ex girlfriend), raped or be blamed for it, unfortunately. So, some girls may be naturally cautious who they date in a long term relationship if they don’t know this person very well (even if they think the person is drop dead gorgeous). I’m sorry that it sounded harsh and it’s not the same for everyone, but this is one issue ~ the issue of safety
http://www.aic.gov.au/documents/5/8/D/%7B58D8592E-CEF7-4005-AB11-B7A8B4842399%7DRPP56.pdf
I don’t immediately agree to date someone unless we’d been in contact for some time. This is because my mum brought me up to be cautious. My mum was raped repetitively when she was younger and more than two handfuls of my friends had been raped by high school. There is an element of caution.
@ Rachel. Personally, you seem very stuck up yourself to me. Why are you generalising ‘White Australian Women’ as racist and superficial (a form of racism in itself). Isn’t that kind of rude?
You’re putting down Australia as a country.
Of course, there is less interracial marriage in Australia ~ there are significantly LESS PEOPLE population-wise, and not everyone will decide to get married even if they’re in a stable, long term relationship, with the intention of staying together forever. Just check out the birthing rates~
What if I said that I found your view superficial ~ that you just want to date a guy because he’s Asian?
That sounds like your objectifying the person!
When I’m in a relationship, it’s not because my partner comes from a particular race or country, but it’s because I love them as a person. Yet, this is supposed to be a stuck up and backward view? (-_-)*
Have you even been to Australia or taken the time to understand the people who live there? There is a different mainstream social dating etiquette for some people in Australia. There are many people who don’t feel as though the have to date. They may date someone not just because they think a guy might look good, but because they’ve taken the time to know him too.
Such as, the guy is really funny, has similar hobbies and interests, he is really kind or has something else that seems to be special about him.
As someone of Aboriginal descent that looks Caucasian, I take offence to the generalisations you are making about how Australians treat people of Aboriginal descent in modern times. Traditional Aboriginal culture is so remotely different from mainstream Australian cultures that creating a completely equal society in Australia destroys the culture in some ways.
There are still some traditional Elders who are spiritually not interested in money, possessions or a Western education. There is a big difference between someone who is a traditional Elder, someone who’s trying to fit into the city life, and someone who’s been rejected from their communities and is selfishly addicted to alcohol and drugs to the detriment of their children. It is up to the people who are alcoholics to seek the services that will help them for the benefit of their children. Go to the streets of Darwin, see a toddler with piss down her legs and flies buzzing around her, despite a water hose nearby, because the parent is no good.
A famous Aboriginal guy supported by International Media as an Aboriginal Artist and role model, beat up his girlfriend and threatened his wife with a machete on an alcohol-drug binge. Go to the city, live there for a year, see if you can fix the problem and then go to the community, live there, understand the culture, and you will see that integration is not something that can be solved immediately or is welcomed by communities. Aboriginal people were raped, massacred, stripped of their language and culture, when the British settlers and convicts landed in Australia and fed them on booze and alcohol. Not many Australian People could proficiently write or read well as convicts and fairly poor immigrants to be able to vote with understanding, and there was very little choice involved in coming to Australia ~ a prison. Only if you were upper class, could speak British or had been to Britain and had been cultured, were you not working a Blue Collared Job. The Australian Government has apologised and is trying really hard to please all Australians from respectful and financial perspective. The problem, which was initially caused by Britain, affected almost everyone, including ‘criminals’, Aboriginals, the Irish, Chinese, almost everyone but the British was discriminated against in the settler period of Australian history. But, I’ve never heard of the British Government claiming any responsibility for what happened. Rather, there are a lot of racist comments about Australia being & backwards in thinking.
1)Papau New Guinea liberated from Australia relatively quickly without burning houses down and starving the people of the food sources, unlike Ireland and the Potato Famine and the IRA.
2)Australia has apologised, given land, given money, scholarships, houses, cars and many things to try and appease Australian Aboriginals tragically affected in the past and present. Where's the compensation from the British Government towards the millions of native people across the world who were negatively affected by British Invasion and Colonialism
Australia still provides financial favouring and support towards East Timor, Indonesia and Vietnam as recognition that Australia must be held responsible for war involvement in these countries.
3)There were people in Australia who married inter racially from the criminal times ~ they were convicts sent to prison…what more social shame did they have to lose?
The children of these interracial marriages (the Stolen Generation) were ripped from the parents homes and taken away by the Upper Class voters who could read and write and were “cultured”. Again- no recognition, no apology. It wasn’t only Aboriginal people that lost their kids forever, but other partners did too.
I find it offensive that you are looking down upon my country without looking at flaws that exist in your own country. Australia is doing well economically, the education system is pretty decent, the top number of interracial marriages come from people originally from countries in Asia, people work really long hours to achieve what they do- they don’t expect it to be handed down to them. Lots of money earned by tax payers is given to countries, like Indonesia, with the hope of a peaceful world with equal opportunities.
Australia is far from a perfect country, there is some racism. From what I know, there is racism in every country to some degree. It strikes me that when a few people can be rude here, there are also many who are amazingly kind and generous. I’m sorry if I sounded harsh before ~ Actually I don’t have a problem with British people or the country and have made some really nice friends from there, but it feels annoying to be constantly put down when other places have their own problems ~ so I just felt the urge to point out that Britain isn’t perfect either. Really, both countries have come a long way from the past.
Lets just not complain about each other and try our best to improve what we have in our own countries, hey?! ^_^
@ Jason
Sydney is not the most diverse city in Australia. Actually, Darwin and Perth are found to be the most multicultural cities, considering the number of people that live there. So, it is not the ‘New York of Australia’ at all ^_^`
It’s a very beautiful city, but many Australians will advise to experience a different city as well, because Sydney is very expensive and is about the rich and elite, rather what people here tend to identify as ‘ordinary’.
One thing I notices, is that people in Sydney seem to smile less, even in the shops, because there is the hurry to get to places on time and there is a huge value on money. It is true that the Cronulla Riots did not occur in the other Capital Cities. In fact, just before they occurred there was tension with immigrants specifically targeting and bashing up other immigrants on the Australian people living there…which, apparently led to the riots. Either way…
Sydney = a great place to visit, if you have the money, to experience the luxury and the arts of prestigious Australian talent and accommodation.
Melbourne = for struggling artists, where talent is discovered
Queensland = Most famous in Australia for setting modern, mainstream youth culture ~ and the surfy-bronze-kissed look shown in TV shows like ‘Neighbours’, beautiful oceans and rainforests.
Canberra = For people interested in politics, where the Parliament House is located.
Darwin = Link to Traditional Aboriginal culture, city of young people wearing little clothing and interested in expressing sexual freedom and the possibly the highest male possibly population.
Adelaide = Apparently has some fairly spectacular festivals?
Perth = Not exactly sure what Perth is well known for, never been there…
Hobart = For being located in Tasmania, a part of Australia which is perceived to be awe-inspiringly beautiful scenry <3
The evolution of a bogan…
http://media.smh.com.au/national/selections/the-evolution-of-the-bogan-2031637.html?&exc_from=strap
Add that to the list..
A bogan would call an anti-racist racist against the racist group so the anti-racist cannot take the anti-racist stance any more.
Hope it makes sense.
@Bubbles
While I appreciate your thoughtfulness, it doesn’t change the fact that the majority of the Australian population is conservative, ignorant and narrow-minded.
I do not look down upon Australia, I just see that they’re just too proud to see the truth of who the majority of them are and change for the better.
I left a racist country to come into another racist country. So I will move on.. don’t worry about me.
http://www.smh.com.au/entertainment/music/how-i-beat-bullies-of-rocknroll-20101106-17i3j.html
“Sebastian said his partner, now wife, Jules, was also ridiculed.
”[The musician] was taunting me the whole way down the red carpet and through the night as well. And then he said something to Jules as well and it kind of tipped me over the edge. Yeah, that was my early experience of the ARIAs, there was just a lot of attitude – it actually wasn’t that pleasant.””
I wonder what the artists said to ridicule Guy Sebastian’s wife..
@Bubbles
I didn’t say that white Australian women were racist and superficial – I said that the kind of people you meet in clubs and bars – and yes, mostly white women go to those – are superficial! Go back and actually read what I said and maybe you’ll understand. It’s true – people in bars are superficial – more superficial than if you were to meet someone at a library or anime convention or whatever.
The only reason why people are at clubs is to JUDGE PEOPLE ON THEIR LOOKS AND WHAT THEY ARE WEARING. It is the most superficial environment you can be in. You cannot have a conversation in those places, so it’s sure not what is on the inside that is being judged.
Also, if you go back and read my post again, you’ll see that the types of people (including white women) that will be more open minded to a relationship with an Asian guy is AWAY from bars and clubs where, like it or not, the women that go to those places are NOT as open minded to going out with an Asian guy. Like it or not, that’s the type of people that go to clubs, and that’s the way it is, hun.
I honestly think that Aussie girls would be open to dating Asian guys, in environments like at uni or school or a library, it’s just that Asian guys have to work a bit harder to be more assertive, and go against negative stereotypes such as small penis, nerdy (which can be a plus in some cases), shy, weak, asexual, etc The one thing working against them is that women generally prefer to date someone that is taller than they are, and some Asian guys can be quite short. But at the end of the day, I think that most young Australian women would be open to dating an Asian guy, they just don’t know it yet.
So, white Australian women (and any Australian woman) would be quite the opposite of superficial, if you can get away from meeting places such as clubs and pubs. The quieter environment works for Asian guys, IMO.
Actually, if you met me I am pretty down-to-earth, it’s just that, in case you hadn’t realised, this is a comment board – where we give our opinion.
I don’t recall saying that I’d ONLY date an Asian guy. I would like to date an Asian guy, I’d be open to it, but if someone has a good personality then I would be open to any ethnicity. There are Asian guys here that are only keen on dating white women? Why are you not labelling them as ‘objectifying white women’?
I’m sure that there are plenty of people who want to date someone of a different race because of what the race represents from the media, then there are people who fall in love with the personality and the race is secondary, finally, we have what is called a ‘preference’. If a guy had a preference for only short, petite girls, this would pretty much rule out MOST black women as well as ethnic New Zealand women, and favour Asian women. Is this objectifying or just a preference? I know that I have a preference for guys around my height: 5’5″, with dark eyes, hair and slightly dark skin, which benefits Asian guys. But would I turn down an opportunity to date someone if I got along well with them but they didn’t fit that preference, of course not. We all have preferences, every one of us, whether it’s a preference to date someone that is not over 6’8″, and someone that is not morbidly obese.
I don’t know which comments you were reading, but never did I day that it was backward to fall in love with someone for their personality and that it was backward to do that. Actually reading the rest of your post, it seems as if you are addressing the original author.
@Jason
That is an interesting article, but the rude guy at the ARIAS simply sounds like an asshole, rather than a racist.
@ Jason
That’s because there’s racism in every country. Probably, the only time it will cease to exist will be the time when people wont be able to identify what race is anymore, unfortunately. Saying that, I’ve met very few people in Austraia who are racist. The Australian media; though, that’s something different…particularly, Channel Nine.
The only way to determine a majority of people would be to do a survey of everyone in Australia. Why not suggest the argument to this site: http://news.sbs.com.au/insight/
You might be surprised to discover how open minded many people turn out to be.
Guy Sebastian admitted to receiving an enormous amount of harrassment before his wife was even there. It’s not for racial reasons. Many artists were unhappy because they felt he got the easy way into the music industry by winning Australian Idol. So, he was harrassed by jealous musicians. His wife is probably being subjected to harrassment because she is with him.
@ Rachel
Of course people at pubs and clubs are thinking in a superficial. You can’t hear anything over the music to actually be able to talk to someone. It doesn’t mean they’re superficial people, though, Many girls are out with their girlfriends to just have fun, dance, maybe check out some guys with friends, but rarely with an intention of getting in a serious relationship (not a fling). It’s something different from how they would behave normally. If a guy can do something that looks cool, like break dance, no matter his race, he probably has more of a chance of getting a fling than the others around him.
Uni, the beach or on the bus are probably the easiest places to meet someone in Australia.
Though, it’s likely that it will take some time to establish into a romantic, long term relationship.
I’m sorry, but it feels a bit daunting to read through 2 years worth? of comments. I just commented on a random page I clicked on somewhere back…and I don’t know where that was because it was random ^_^`
Maybe some time I will read through your comments when I have a whole day spare
I did remember ‘superficial’ and ’20 years backwards’ being used as describing words, though…which seems a bit misleading. Maybe I mistood you?
As long as you weren’t putting Australia down over a racist stereotype, then I appologize for misunderstanding and being really harsh. If you haven’t lived here for a long period of time then it would be difficult to be able to know what it’s like, anhow…
Also, it sounds like the thread owner had some insecurity issues when he first wrote the blog?
If the girl is highly attractive, she already has assertive competition. Of course, it would probably help other guys to be more assertive to compete with the other guys. Then, there is more complicated stuff. For example, if the girl’s friend has a crush on the guy, it is likely that she will give up on him whether the guy likes the friend or not.
Seriously, I don’t know why guys have such a huge hang up over the size of their penises. Very few women actually care, not even the “really hot one’s”. It’s mainly just guys who are obsessed with the size of the other guys’ penises.
Nice, funny attractive guy > guy with big penis or STDs.
You probably are really are down to Earth, but you can’t expect other people not to react on a forum dedicated to them being told they’re racist and superficial. It doesn’t feel so nice, does it?!
Oh no, I think the guys who only want to date white women are weird too. Who wants someone to date you just because you’re a White handbag or a Black handbag or an Asian styled handbag?!
That’s silly and it doesn’t feel so nice. People want someone to like them because they think they look like a beautiful woman, or like their sense of humour or something like that…Besides, saying you only like White women is like a put down to other women, which isn’t very appealing. There are just as many beautiful and kind Asian and Black women out there!
Meh, I don’t have a preference. The guys I’ve been interested in/dated have all looked completely different. Besides, if you travel around Asia, you’ll see that there are a lot of tall guys there!
My brothers aren’t short guys (both over 6ft) and the didn’t stand out in Tokyo or Osaka in Japan.
My Ex-Boyfriend was over 6 foot tall and Japanese <3
Though, I don't have a preference for tall guys either. If the chemistry is there, then that helps.
There are many short, petite New Zealander's (Maori) and Black women. Not many people consider morbid obesity/extreme annorexia to be attractive because the individual is really sick.
@ Jason
Since you claim that White Australian girls don’t like Asian guy and are superficial, a racist claim…aren’t you a bit of a Bogan?
From today’s Sydney Morning Herald article:
- http://www.smh.com.au/technology/technology-news/riding-the-tube-20101113-17rzy.html
Natalie Tran from Melbourne, of YouTube fame with 800,000 subscribers has this to say about Australia racism:
“Has she grown up with racism? She laughs. “Of course! It’s very hard not to experience racism in Australia. All the time. It’s tough, because when people let it go, that’s when it becomes acceptable. I don’t like people spouting ignorance in public places and thinking it’s OK. And I don’t like people ignoring it. I understand you have to pick your battles and I understand it’s dangerous but if people didn’t let it happen, it wouldn’t happen.”
She speaks the truth I tell you as a minority myself. White Aussies dismiss it. But we minorities (who look different) have dealt with it for ages and when we finally speak up, we are told to shut up because speaking up means we’re racist back to the whites. That is how it is in Australia apparently.
It is institutionalised here. No matter how many people ignore it. The evidence is all around you:
1. Minorities (who don’t look white) in upper management? Not many. White boys’ club.
2. Minorities (who don’t look white) in interracial relationship? Not many men, which means the minority women felt oppressed and want to marry locals to be accepted.
3. Minorities (who don’t look white) hanging out together? Not many, most Aussie white actually STICK TO THEMSELVES FIRST and so minorities (who don’t look white) mix amongst minorities (who don’t look white). The rare cases are minority women who want to fit in (see point #2).
4. Minorities (who don’t look white) appearing on media? Not many, unless you count Border Patrol which makes minorities (who don’t look white) the enemy. The exception is of course minority women because they’re welcomed by white men to oppress us further.
No matter how you take these 4 points. EVIDENCE IS ALL AROUND YOU. Look around and start asking WHY instead of making excuses.
Do I have a chip on my shoulder? I know you will bring that up. Perhaps so but I do not pretend everything is OK. I know what I have to go through in my life and I’m prepared for a life worth living that comes with sweat and tears. But that doesn’t mean I won’t/shouldn’t speak up for MY PEOPLE. Equality is not achieved by everybody pretending nothing is wrong.
So how does one combat this racism?
I don’t have an answer. But I would recommend anyone who wants to break out to “run your own business” instead of working for some corporate entity.
See point #1 above.
Do something for yourself and breakaway. When I have the option, I will definitely “f*ck off because Australia is FULL” according to the locals here.
And Mooiness. I love your forum because this is the only place I can voice my opinion.
In SMH.COM.AU, they CENSOR everything that has the word “racism” in it. It is like it never exists in Australia. While there are plenty of discussion about “feminism, ageism, homophobia, etc.”
Racism is really a touchy subject with the Aussies.
Dear Bubbles and Rachel,
Please ignore Jason, as you said, he is a total asian-bogan. We all know there is racism every where, and the fantasy of the “bamboo-curtain” is a myth that a lot of anglo-asians would secretly like to exist. What a perfect excuse! Being a victim, the new fashion, no more individual responsability! All our problems are caused by others… welcome to an era of childish behavior, easy solutions and racist tantrums. Junk-life: racism as an excuse for our failures.
Jason, you are seriously going to make me cry!!! Could you spend as much time and energy on dating a nice aussie white girl?
Write a book, make a documentary, do something, but please just stop wasting your time ranting on the web about your impotency!
Jason, I spent this Friday night at the Ivy’s Pool Club and it was great! I Had a fantastic time with very cute white girls, so what is your problem?
@rachel
I totally agreed with rachel we should boost up the white australian women and asian men ratios.
sometimes its hard but you still have to send the vibes eye contact and smile showing we are interested. you only have one chances say something to her even if we make a fool out of yourself.
@ Jason
Yes, you do have a chip on your shoulder.
The fact that 800, 000 people were willing to subscribe actually shows a lot of openess in Australia when your saying it’s dismissed completely. In fact, it’s not dismissed just like that at all. Australian media CONSTANTLY talks abouts racism. Just Google it.
There are Australians who will also point out that there is racism targetting Caucasians in Australia too. There is racism in every country as far as I know of from my experiences of living overseas and conversations with people from different countries. Racism is a mindset, not something born into people from a particular country.
Also, there’s a difference between being a victim and being proactive. If you have a victim mindset then there is more chance that you will end up being a victim over victor.
@ Kim
Exactly what I was thinking ^_^ <3
to Racheal and Jason
im sorry but..i read thru a few of your posts and had to stop to scroll to post a post lol
here is the reason why the people u met in Sydney are stuck up..because its Sydney..Americ..i mean Australia as its known today is to americanised..the people you meet in Sydney sound american..act american.run around doing sweet F all all day american..why because you watch the bullshit on TV you said it yourself Racheal..NBC today on 7 mate and think wow that was cool we should do that in Sydney..Melbourne…Brisbane..all the major cities in Australia are the same..how do i know this? because ive been to those cities and i come from a small country town about 4 hours from Sydney that has a population of around 150 people..about 40 k’s from where i live there is a town called Young..has a population of around 14 thousand its the Cherry Capital of Australia..every year we have the cheery season..pickers from all over the country and all over the world..canada..germany..america..france..japan..china etc..etc…all come to pick cherries..yet everyone gets along with them..while you can tell they are cherry pickers (the way they dress isnt the best) you still say G’day to em if they say hello..why..because our town..isnt in a hurry like Sydney..we dont care much about that..there isnt a spot in town called chinatown..its just Young infact the town has so much chinese hertiage there is a place called the Chinese gardens..we have a SISTER CITY in China..and then 40 k’s the other way from where i live there is a town called Cowra..you might have heard of it..it has a RICH Japanese history..back in WW2 they had a POW camp there that housed the Japanese..look up the Cowra breakout..i think from memory it was the WORST POW breakout in australian history…but to SYMBOLISE that we are past that Cowra has made a japanese garden..and a monument at the old POW site to say this will NEVER happen again..why..because these small country towns ARENT racist or bised about peoples race or culture like the people from the city
oh yeah..and most of the people from these towns..you would call a Bogan Racheal..thing is there more likey to be LESS racist then you..thats my honest opinion…why do i think you would call them that?? probley because the town is smaller then a suburb in Sydney and anything that doesnt have a myers or david jones in it is too boganish for alot of so called aussies..most of you dont even know what hard work is..you claim a hard days work..what about the farmers struggling..right now they cant harvet there winter crops because its too wet..yet 2 years ago it was 2 dry to grow anything..they are they ones that put food on ur table..and the truck drivers doing 24 hour drive runs back n forth…the outback and these small towns RUN the cities behind the scene..without us..there would be no cities anyway us “bogans” are the backbone of Australia
@JP
Good insight from the country. I tend to get along well with people from country/Perth/Adelaide.
You’re right about Sydney women trying to emulate American. But they’re not as open-minded as American. They’re very conservative here in dating (esp. finding other races attractive), etc. Sexual chemistry = Love for most. To get girls here, you must look fit (or buff to a large extent), have extrovert qualities and never ever show a personality quirkiness/flaw.
I should know that. I’ve lived here for 7 years and have acted like an alpha male in this dog-eat-dog world. But deep down, I’m still myself. I just have a facade because it is what the women here look for.
But the more I improve myself, the more I see them as shallow. That is why once my startup takes off I want to move elsewhere. There is no place in my heart for someone with no heart.
Hello I am american and I’m visiting friends i’ve met while i was backpacking around the world. I was raised in NYC but go tired of seeing the same things everyday. As an Korean male growin up america i’ve noticed a lot of people are closed minded as well its not just Sydney it actually happens all over the world and I’ve noticed that cause well.. I’ve been all over the world. As a person you should try and gain as much life experiences as you can and how to achieve that is to actually keep trying. No pain no gain is life’s motto. I have had many girlfriends everthing from Brazilian, Dominican, American, ton of asians, aussies. I’m not the best looking guy but I give it my best and sooner or later it becomes easier to go up to girls. Women can always tell if your nervous, drunk, idiot, or whatever the important thing is be yourself and have fun doing it! I have had a lot of women tell me they love me because I’m fun, loving, handsome, a lot of things and always compliment a lady back. Keep an open mind and if it helps get a drink first to losen things up. Good luck to all my asian brothers keep trying and you’ll have so much fun.
[...] you. Yeah, you Asian white-fever types who are still wondering how to get a white girlfriend, you should go ask Peter Chao. Seriously, ask him and he might just do a video to answer the [...]
I disagree. I am a member of the biggest AMWF social networking site out there. And I see Aussie chicks on the site looking for Asian men all the time. http://www.AsianCaucasianTurf.com
@rachel
Im from melbourne. Nice city. Great food.
Rachel are you white right from what I read? which state in australia?
Coz you seem to be the type who is open to things and think outside the box. You dont sound stuck up.
Is it possible to get to know you more? You seem to know alot? email me or something if you would like?
Multicultural. But still oppression. – clubs – restaurants – venues etc..
Ive been reading the posts here and its interesting.
Im asian myself (male). I do agree there is racism in australia but media and the majority dont acknowledge it. More like they dont let others know its an issue or else there will be some sort of rally against the government or something.
What can I say its all over the world..usa etc..
White women dont really tend to date asian men. As jason posted earlier with the Youtube sensation – Natalia tran comments. Thats perfect example of how minorities are being oppressed. Its not rocket science.
Its just that I think Australia wants Australia to be run by whites rather than take orders by an asian etc..Because I heard white people dont like taking orders from non whites.
I think there is a gross generalization in most of the comments.
First thing is: Most of the girls you see around town in Sydney partying in night clubs are not Australian, but mainly english, or irish immigrants, like most of you are immigrant chinese, or korean. So yes they don’t tend to go to asian guys because they are not looking for you but for a real aussie cliche, or simply they are not looking for other tourists.
Secondly, Australia is much more open than most of the asian country. Mainland Chinese and Honkies, Japanese or Korean, at home are the most xenophobic people ever. Australia has over 100 ethnic groups living together!
You can keep on whinging and pretend the world hates you, while it’s just a story you are telling yourself….go for it, love doesn’t need a skin colour.
@Kim
You are talking about visitors of Australia, not really the citizens.
I have seen more asian women even visitors come to Australia to meet white men.
In Australia or the world Asian women are more welcomed in society because they are women. White men like Asian women etc…
But Asian Males are not accepted in a sense. White women dont like asian men, where White men dont want to socialize with asian men. The majority that is.
Love is how you feel for the person and how the person treats you. Color is not an issue you are right. But what catches your attention is looks.
Looks come first and personality comes second. Whoever says personality comes first is in denial. You see the person (thats looks) and thats what catches your attention then when you get to know them personality comes in place.
Kim are you white? have even dated asian men?
Well I have to agree. The white men here in Australia loves the Asian women. And all these Asian women wants is a visa to be able to live in OZ. This world is unfair. It’s true. The white men think they are superior than others. But they are a lazy bunch of man kind. I asked a few white friends ” Do you love Chinese food?” And they will be like ” Hell yeah love chinese food a lot” But why are you discriminating against the Asians here? I got a paused answer from them. They can’t live the fact that Asians are smarter than them.
I have white female friends who is struggling in their relationship with a white man but still rather be with them than an Asian man. I really don’t get it. They can go on saying they wanna find a decent guy and yet being choosy only wanting a white guy. Good luck in finding a decent white guy. Oz’s got a high divorce rate and if you see the data, it is all between a white man and a white female. Oz is far behind the rest of the world. Sad to say it might not happen until maybe 20-30 years time where the white female will be more open towards the Asian men. Otherwise they will have to pick the Afgan guys! LOL.
Hi Lambov,
I am white, female, blondey, 22 years old.
I have dated 2 Asian men.
I disagree with what you said about personality / looks. Especially when it comes to men.
With relationships, women will generally end up with a man who is as powerful as she is beautiful.
Women are judged on looks (this includes looking happy / kind).
Men are judged on power.
Power can be expressed in many different ways, one is money, another is confidence, others could include violence or sports. Generally, I would say power is expressed through self-belief (sounds like you may be lacking).
You’re right about looks being important, but looks are really only important for women, not men. And even for women, it’s not so much simple physical characteristics, the most important thing is the type of person you appear to be.
Have you ever seen someone who’s comfortable with themselves, has shiney eyes, smiling – a genuine smile and felt instantly attracted to him/her, even if they were fat or ugly?
In your last post you sound winey. You sound negative. You sound judgmental. I don’t need to see you, I don’t need to know what nationality you are, I already know I wouldn’t want to go out with you.
Good skill,
Louisa
Des, did you read you post? How many generalisations did you make? If you want to whinge about racism and discrimination, perhaps you should stop being racist yourself.
Louisa
I am not being racist here.I am the victim of racism here instead. I am just saying based on my experience.
um are you serious Des?
“Good luck in finding a decent white guy.”
“Otherwise they will have to pick the Afgan guys! LOL.”
Maybe stop being racist to others, before complaining about people being racist to you.
Hey people.
I’m the owner of this blog and I am repeating the rules here again: be nice to each other and although I know it’s hard to avoid bringing up cultural and racial stereotypes in this discussion, you don’t have to be a racist prick about it.
I will mark all offending comments as spam which will make it harder for you to comment again. So once again, play nice.
No Lambov 10, I am an asian man, married to an australian beautiful woman. I ve dated more white women than asian women in my life. And no looks doesn t come first but personnality, self confidence and integrity. Those quality are much appretiated by a lot of white women that are interested in having an harmonious family life. That s why Australia has an amazing rising number of mixed couple. There are dozens of schools in the North shore or the eastern suburbs with a majority of asians. Do you see any complaints to that? the myth of a crafted racism against asian male is an ideological trap. the more you are going to believe in it the more you are going to become a cliche.
Believe in yourself, work on your inner strenght and stop whinghing like a little boy. Be a man and not the yellow pussy that you are afraid to be.
Respect people like Louisa, she’s welcoming you in her country with open mind and open hand
Lambov,
Wow you experienced racism, who hasnt? Have a cry dude…..
I was with my ex for 6 years, he is Greek, he came here when he was 15 years old, so his family is very Greek and they didn’t like me for a long time because I am not Greek. His sister would refuse to speak english with me, even though she went to school here and spoke better english than my ex. I was always the only non-Greek person and half the conversations were in Greek. His Step-Mum, Aunty & sister would speak about me in Greek while I was there. People called me the white gypsie (gypsie is an insult in Greek) I eventually learned Greek, still speak pretty well
Before my ex, about 8 years ago, I went out with an Asian guy called William nick-named Honda, he lived in Villawood, drove a silver holden commodore. Also, an Asian guy called Paul, he had a black honda supra, though mostly he drove his Dad’s car, a red station-wagon, he lived in Liverpool. I can’t recall much else, was a long time ago.
More recently, I went out with a Syrian guy for awhile, his friends and family often refuse to speak english, people leave me out of conversations, I started picking up some arabic to compensate
His Dad refused to have anything to do with me at first, wouldn’t even say “hello” for ages, because I am white. I am also persistent and would still say hello, still be polite, every time I saw him, eventually he came around. I played monopoly with his little brother and he wouldn’t help clean up because “cleaning is for girls” so I told him I would race him to straighten the stack of cards and he ended up doing it 
There have been a million times when people have put me down for being a girl, being blonde, being “dumb”, being white – whatever.
Everyone gets put down, everyone gets judged, get over it, you’re not special. If you want to waste your life complaining and focusing on how hard it is, feel free
Oh & by the way, my Dad was born in Malta, he came to Australia by ship when he was 10, he had blonde hair at that time and everyone teased him all through school because he spoke funny