We had met on the bus through a mutual friend. The three of us would meet up for lunches because we all worked near the same area in the city. After a few weeks, I decided to ask her out.
At the time, I thought she was receptive. I’d ask her out for movies and dinner alone and she’d come. And we always had a lot to talk about. Little did I know I was already in the friend zone.
In between the times that I’d see her alone, we would go out in a group and there was always this other guy there. And even though they didn’t act like a couple, I could see from the way their friends were behaving that there was something more to it.
And I was right. The guy had been pursuing her before I had shown up and apparently she had told him she wasn’t ready yet and to give her some time. He had been waiting patiently for his chance. I think me coming along sorta sped things up a bit – they hooked up not long after.
I was bitter and disappointed. I chose to express it in a passive-aggressive way by writing her an email. In it I told her that I did like her and was sorry that it didn’t go my way; I had wished her all the best, and that I can’t see her “for a while”.
Truth was, I never wanted to see her again. I don’t believe in the “let’s be friends” crap. And I was actually more angry than I had come across in the email. I even deliberately chose a later bus just to avoid her.
In the email, I also told her that maybe she should had said something about the other guy, especially the times when we were out alone together. I told her that I would have gotten the hint and that would have been that. We would have saved each other a lot of time and energy.
She replied back, “I didn’t know you felt that way.” Please. You knew!
What I would have preferred was this: if you didn’t like me, don’t agree to go out with me. Or you could have made it obvious that I was strictly a friend. I know you were probably trying to protect my feelings but sooner or later, they were gonna get hurt anyway.
Or maybe you weren’t doing that at all. Maybe you were stringing me along to see which guy you’d end up liking better.
So you were either selfish or indecisive, or worse, both. Call it sour grapes or whatever, in hind sight I’m glad that we didn’t get together. It would have been short-lived anyway. And because we weren’t a couple, I had met her. But that’s a whole different story altogether. ๐
[tags]dating, single life[/tags]