In a very crude way, marriage is treated more and more like that today. In the beginning, it’s all cute and cuddly and everything is brand new. Then reality sinks in and people realise that it actually takes effort and commitment to make it work.
I’m not debating the principle of divorce. Everyone is entitled to their own pursuit of happiness and most times angry and bitter people who are not compatible in the first place, are better off not being together. The question then becomes: why were they even married then?
I feel that because divorce is so common-placed now, the psychological barrier to getting married is also lowered – people don’t treat it as such a serious thing anymore, when the exit strategy is readily and easily available.
That is why many people do not go into it with the right mindset. To them, marriage is like something to try on for a little while, and if it doesn’t fit they can always throw it out later. They go into it without taking seriously the commitment that is required from both parties. They go into it without thinking if the other person is who they really want as a partner, or are they just making a compromise that they will regret later on?
A compounding factor is that society still expects marriage to be a necessary step in life. So everything piles up:
- Getting married for the wrong reasons.
- Getting married to the wrong person.
- Getting married at the wrong time because you’re not financially and emotionally ready.
Having seen what has happened to friends and acquaintances, I should be cynical about marriage. But I’m not. I still think that it’s a great thing if all the wrong reasons above were reversed.
What was it that I said about bad sex, that it is not better than no sex? I think the similar is even more true about marriages. So I’m gonna take my own sweet time, thank you very much. 😉