Nice guys and the girls who walk over them

Contrary to what it says on the movie poster, in the real world nice guys are not as noble and would not be as happy as Ducky at the end of the movie when Andie got with Blane
I mentioned something called “The Ducky Syndrome” previously - the nice guy likes the pretty girl but the pretty girl likes the handsome/macho-er rich guy, and the nice guy is relegated to mere “friends” status. Although the character of Blane played by Andrew McCarthy is meant to be hated by the audience for ruining whatever chances that Ducky would ever have had with Andie, and for making Andie go through an emotional roller-coaster to finally be with him, he was actually a nice guy.
So there lies the rub. Being nice would help you cinch the deal if the girl is already into your looks, wealth or social status. Being nice alone is not enough.
And to make things complicated, women at different stages of their lives want different things. Younger women usually are more into the superficial and do not care if the guy will be nice to her or not. But how do you know what stage she’s at? Well you wouldn’t know until you’ve started going after her.
There are tell-tale signs that she isn’t at the stage that would make her worth your time and effort, and money to go after. One good indicator is you doing all the giving and she’s doing all the taking, even as she blatantly tells you about other guys that she prefers. When you get that, abort the chase. I repeat: ABORT.
The other problem with being stupidly nice, and letting her walk over you is that no girl would want a guy with no backbone anyway. Don’t fool yourself that you’d win her over by being nice because to her by then, you are a servant boy with no pay or benefits. Or worse, a sugar daddy with no benefits.
In a way, nice guys are just as masochistic as the girls who love the challenge of taming the bad boy. Even if the bad boy tones down his behaviour to hook the girl in at first, after he knows that she’d stick through his bullshit the bad behaviour returns.
Bad boys are bad because the girls who are into them let them get away with their bad behaviour. And it is the same with the nice guys who are forever complaining about not getting anywhere with girls. It is because the nice guys let women get away with their own bad behaviour.
For the above reason there will always be nice guys who’d never learn, and there will always be hotchicks with douchebags. (via MetaFilter)

Photos from HCwDB
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17 Responses to “Nice guys and the girls who walk over them”
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Aug 28 2007 / 8:08 am
This is so funny. I’ve been thinking of doing a blog about nice guys this morning and wondering which angle I should be coming from. I was also trying to figure out “nice guys finish first or finish last?” Sekali you beat me to it! and you did it so well, I wouldn’t be able to do such a good piece.
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Aug 28 2007 / 8:39 am
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Aug 28 2007 / 9:15 am
this happens to girls too.
“you’re so great to talk to about stuff…
how can i get her to like me?”not that i’m bitter or anything …
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Aug 28 2007 / 10:18 am
ya blur thing, like to hear from that perspective .
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Aug 28 2007 / 12:46 pm
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Aug 28 2007 / 4:21 pm
God, check out the sex-ay guys in those pics, wish I could have a piece of that!!
Yeah, it’s true, you ALWAYS see the nice guy chasing after the girl, whilst the girl is chasing after the bad boy/asshole. I myself have dated numerous bad boys whilst turning down the nice guys (I know, I know, my bad!).
However, I think most girls get over constant paranoia about being cheated on, unanswered phone calls, looking after drunken boyfriends, and cryign themselves to sleep at night… In the end, they just want a nice guy who treats them well and is gonna be there. That’s my opinion anyway
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Aug 28 2007 / 9:01 pm
ABORT! ABORT! TAKE EMERGENCY ACTION!
lol

Yeah been there, done that. Actually being a bit of a hard ass can be quiet fun, as long as you don’t go into Jerk country, people respect you more. Since I’ve become a retail manager I’ve had to harden up a fair bit and I got to admit, I’am starting to like it
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Aug 28 2007 / 9:49 pm
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Aug 28 2007 / 10:20 pm
I feel that it’s just typical human nature that when a person is too nice, they get treated like doormat and are often ignored and forgotten. It applies to both sexes, and it is definitely unfair to say that only nice guys are walk over. Nice girls get walk over as well.
Let face it, guys at different stages of their lives want different things too. When they are younger, they want sexy high maintenance girls who have the biggest boobs or longest legs. Plain Jane with the heart of gold will hardly get any attention. Eventually guys grows up (if they ever) and decide to find a wife and the criteria is different again.
Similarly, guys love the challenge of chasing “hard to get” girls. And guys often lose interest when the girl is too easy. You should know. You are a guy.
Anyway, I feel that a person is often attracted to the same type of guy/girl. So maybe the nice guy/girl who gets trampled upon by bad guy/girl should consider other option like dating someone as nice as them.
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Aug 28 2007 / 10:25 pm
Aiya, sad lah, sad lah. I was reading a forum about these nice guys writing in to complain about how they have been overlooked and left on the shelf etc. Actually there’s a difference between a nice guy and a passive guy.
You can be a really nice guy but still pursue girls actively. Then the girls will take notice and stay interested. You just have to find other ways to be ‘bad’ and more exciting. I leave it to your imagination but I’m sure nice guys have a wild streak in them too.
If a girl leaves a nice guy for a bad ass, then she probably deserves it. But if a nice girl leaves a bad boy for a nice guy, she’ll know how to treasure him.
Blinkymummy’s Good Fren looks like a nice guy too but hey, he’s got her smitten and most importantly, they’re really happy together. So, nice guys do get it afterall!
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Aug 28 2007 / 10:42 pm
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Aug 29 2007 / 3:41 am
A lot of people seem to confuse being nice with being a spineless dork.
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Aug 29 2007 / 8:31 am
I second Mooi’s testimoney on BM’s GF. Hahaha.
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Aug 29 2007 / 8:52 am
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Aug 29 2007 / 4:35 pm
LOL those pics are hilarious! The guy at the bottom right looks like Steven Seagal
And i have to admit, the women in the top two pics look like they’re halfway through a course of female sex hormones following sex changes!
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Aug 29 2007 / 9:38 pm
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