In no particular order, the sucky moments when dating or in a relationship …

1. Asking a girl out for a movie, and she brings her brother along.
2. She was a “maybe”, and not a “yes, definitely” on your scale of girls who you’d go out with. You see each other around a lot. Then one day, you got talking and she gave you her number. You called her and she blows you off.
3. She made you waited for it because she thought that “it’s too soon” and that “you should know each other better”. And when she finally decided that she was ready, you knew enough about her that you lost interest in her already.
4. After driving around all night, you failed to find a spot to park and make out at. You got pissy at each other. Then you went home to porn.
5. Being stood up.
6. Whilst being with her, you thought that you can do better than her so you break up. And then you realise: actually, you can’t.
7. She was jealous of your female friends.
8. You weren’t jealous enough.
9. Staying with her because of her body.
10. Meeting her at a party, she touched and flirted with you a lot. After an hour of conversation, she suddenly decided to drop a hint. “Yeah my boyfriend likes that too…”
11. Knowing that you are a rebound, you go into it anyway with predictable results.
12. She thought that she can change you; you thought that you can change her.
13. Having an entire phone conversation revolve around why you didn’t call earlier and you asking her “if it’s so important, why didn’t you just call me?”, and she answering, “obviously I’m not important to you”. And then you both forget what was so goddamn important about the call in the first place.
14. Letting a little trivial detail about her annoyed the hell out of you.
15. Breaking up.
16. Still having to see each other around after because you are in the same circle of friends.
17. Losing half your friends as a result.
18. Which can be alright since you hated her friends anyway.
19. Being rejected.
20. No matter how much of the above you go through, it still hurts every time.

So you know that I was given a matrimonial charm on the weekend, just before I was heading out for drinks too. My mother, if nothing else is very smarts - she knew I’d be in the vicinity of women. However, nothing noteworthy happen on Saturday night. No smiles, no eye contact, no chit-chat, no accidental bump and touch of a woman’s chesticles.

Today was different though. For one, I got in touch again with a girl I had a crush on in primary school (yeah 20 odd years ago!) and another whom I used to party with. Not that I wish for anything to happen with either of them -the girl I had a crush on is now a married mother of a 3 year old and the other is happy with her boyfriend. So it was on Facebook, but it happened on the same day!

Plus I saw these two hot girls at the supermarket today. Usually one would have been enough for me but two! At the supermarket no less. Could it be that this thing works in mysterious ways? You see the theme of today’s events don’t you? Is it slowly winding up its powers before it unleashes all of it and I’m like Chris O’Donnell in that scene from “The Bachelor” where he’s chased by thousands of love-lorn single women?

Pfft, yeah right. As if.

I’m not greedy. One perfect woman will do. Marriage is after all for life, or so it should be anyway. But I wonder if the charm will throw a few my way and let me “evaluate” and decide?

Mom dropped this on my desk …

Me: What’s this?
Mom: It’s a matrimonial charm. It worked for your cousins in Penang. They swear by it.
Me: So you are saying that my natural charm and good looks aren’t good enough?
Mom: Well no, but we all know that you can do with some help.
Me: Who’s “we”?
Mom: Never mind, just put it in your wallet ok?

If it works, you’ll read about it here first.

Jenna Jameson used to be a wholesome looking pornstar, even with the fake tits. Her body was voluptuous and she looked healthy, which is exactly the kind of woman that men fantasise about having sex with. You don’t get to be “Queen of Porn” by looking anemic.

Then blaming her divorce in late 2006 for her sudden weight loss, she went from looking like this …

To this in September. Notice how thin her arms are.

(via Skinny Celeb News)

And now in October, looking even more skinny with the too obvious collarbone and rib cage. The apparently shoddy removal of her implants makes her look worse still.

(via Skinny Celeb News)

Being idolised and fantasised by millions of men (before her weight loss anyway) it can’t be a self-esteem issue right? Is it pressure from society? The fashion industry pushing an impossible image? Are women magazines at fault too? Aren’t these magazines mostly written and edited by women? So, are women their own worst enemies? It had to be asked: why are you all doing this to yourselves?

If you ask me, and I think most men would agree, we like our women to be fleshy and we like feeling and touching their lady lumps. Otherwise, we might as well be having sex with other men. And that would be a problem when we are not gay.

So ladies, unless your body-mass index indicates that you are overweight or obese please have a balance diet and eat everything. Because we don’t want stick-thin versions of you - we just want you.

(this was inspired by Blur Ting’s post about the prevalence of slimming ads for women in Singapore)

Last week in Penang, whilst checking out preparations for the Nine Emperor Gods Festival, I spotted these men sleeping under a Chinese opera stage. Kinda like George sleeping under his desk in Seinfeld.

Meanwhile because of my alcohol withdrawal, I haven’t had any tea …

Or coffee …

If you can imagine a state where you are fidgety but you are also nodding off in the mid-afternoon, that would be me.

The past three days I have been suffering these symptoms:

• antsy
• inability to concentrate
• fidgety
• headache
• heart palpitations
• apathy, or is it mild depression?

At first I put it down to the usual post-holiday blues but then I remembered - I had been drinking 3-4 drinks a day while I was in Penang last week. That is way higher than my usual consumption of 6-7 drinks a week, though that is usually consumed in the one night when I go out, which is not good either. So my current symptoms can only mean one thing - I’m suffering from alcohol withdrawal.

It turns out that you do not have to drink heavily to suffer from the symptoms. All it takes is for a sudden stop of drinking, or a sudden reduction in intake for the symptoms to appear. Supposedly the body would crave for more alcohol during withdrawal but I’m not feeling it and I’m thankful for that.

Though there are treatment programs for the severely dependent, there is no cure for those suffering from milder symptoms like I am. I just have to wait for it to pass.

The other thing that I have learnt is that drinking coffee whilst going through alcohol withdrawal is a big mistake. Coffee delivers caffeine in a big jolt which amplifies my symptoms. Tea is better because it releases its caffeine gradually but no caffeine would be the best, and I have reduced my intake.

However, the consumption of caffeine had become part of my daily routine, and that has its own withdrawal symptoms. Some of them are similar to the ones from alcohol withdrawal too, and I think I’m suffering from an overlap of those symptoms.

In conclusion, the next time that you think you are suffering from a post-holiday depression, you could just be experiencing withdrawal from alcohol. Especially if you drink like I do. And I must say that the feeling now is worse than the withdrawal from a certain other recreational drug.

Yesterday was Blog Action Day and this year’s topic is the environment. Since it’s only two hours past yesterday in Honolulu, I’m not that late to jump on the bandwagon. I know that there are things that you just can’t avoid or live without in a modern society but I’ll relate the easy ways to be a greenie without compromising too much of your lifestyle and which wouldn’t cost the earth (pun!).

Paper, Plastic and Disposables

• Switch to email for all financial communications - shares, bills, bank accounts etc. These are usually the only things that come via snail mail these days.
• Switch to direct deposit for all incoming payments such as salaries, dividends and tax returns - you don’t need to see the cheque in hand do you? All you need is the statement that you have been paid, and that too can be via email.
• Use canvas bags for groceries instead of collecting plastic bags from the supermarket - free up kitchen clutter and go easy on the environment by not throwing so many of them out.
• Use recycled paper products - toilet paper, tissues, and printing paper. You’d be surprised at their quality, and the price is usually lower.
• Use less disposable utensils if possible - bring your own and leave it at your office to clean and re-use.

Electricity

• Use compact fluorescent lights in your home. If you don’t like the harsh white light, use colour shades and cover. And although they may cost more up front, they last a lot longer than equivalent light bulbs.
• Switch off appliances at the wall when you are not home - computer, monitor, video consoles, microwave, TV. You only need them on standby when you are home.
• Turn off lights when they are not needed - no brainer really, plus you save money.
• Repair that fridge seal that no longer sticks - your food stays cooler and your electricity bills get lower.
• Switch to LCD monitors for lower energy consumption - though this is double-edged because you then have to dispose of the old CRT monitor.
• Turn off your computer when not in use. Otherwise, use standby or hibernate as a compromise.
• Don’t use screensavers - set your monitor to turn off after a period of inactivity.
• Use rechargeable batteries.

Car and Transport

When biking and walking is not possible and public transport is too troublesome, a car is a necessary evil. But you can make sure that it runs as efficiently as possible. You’d lower emissions and save money at the pump. Things that you can do:

• Maintain correct tyre pressure.
• Have maintenance done regularly - an efficient engine is a clean engine. Ask around for cheaper mechanics because you don’t have to have expensive maintenance done at the dealer you bought the car from.

Plus combine your car trips and accomplish as many task and errands in one go - fueling up, shopping, groceries, errands etc.

Lifestyle Habits

• If the services are available and convenient, there’s no reason not to sort and collect the recyclables from your garbage.
• Drink from the tap at home or have a water filtration tank if you do not like the taste. Use a washable bottle (stainless steel is best) and bring the water to work or the gym instead of buying bottled water. The logistics surrounding the manufacturing of mineral water is a big cause of pollution and waste - the manufacture of plastics needed, the fuel and emissions from transportation, and the discarded bottles when they are not recycled.
• Take shorter showers. I find that using shower gel is the quickest way.
• Wait for a full load and use cold water for laundry - there’s no difference for normal stains if you use quality cold-water detergents.
• If you are living alone or you have your own toilet, there’s no need to flush for every #1. If your pee is too yellow and too stinky to allow for this method, then you need to drink more water! See above.

Phew. Long list. All these ideas may seem inconsequential if only one person follow them but it all adds up if one person in every house, on every street, in every suburb around the entire country does the same thing. You can make a difference.

Have you got any greenie ideas yourself?