In the news today was a story about the 2005 suicide of a female ambulance officer who’d endured 6 years of workplace bullying. She was 38, and married with a 3 year old daughter.

She could not even leave her car at work because the tyres were let down, her toilet at work was urinated “all over” and she was constantly ridiculed by fellow officers in front of patients, her mother-in-law, Carolynn Hodder, has told the inquiry in a written submission. She believed her death was the culmination of sustained victimisation by colleagues since she started at Cowra in 1999. She said the bullying went up the line to management and was ignored.

Christine Hodder had lodged two formal complaints, one in 2001 and another a few months before she died, about bullying and harassment by several officers and had twice been on stress leave.

Bullying caused woman’s suicide, inquiry told - National - smh.com.au

The bullying was despicable. But what intrigued me more was why had she stayed on in such a vile and toxic workplace for six whole years? Was there really no other choices of employment? Being the husband, wouldn’t it have broken his heart to see his wife in such pain and stress on a daily basis? Why didn’t he encourage her to leave? Or maybe he had tried but she wouldn’t budge? Did she want to make a stand against the bullies? But surely he could have tried even harder then?

If I was placed in such a situation, there’s a limit to my making a stand. I’d first tolerate and then I’d endure. Then I’d make formal complaints. I’d tolerate some more, and maybe suffer retaliation for making a formal complaint. After that, if no actions were taken I’d leave. This is not war, you don’t get a medal for being brave or standing your ground against all odds. In fact, it’s stupid. Why would you want to continue working for a company which doesn’t value your morale?

Christine had made two complains to senior management, and had gone on stress leave twice. I wonder what it was that made her think it was going to be worthwhile to persist. And when she finally decided to leave, why leave in such a final fashion?

In this story, her co-workers are the worst offenders. That’s obvious. But what of the husband? Why didn’t he pull her away from such avoidable misery? And what about Christine herself who facilitated her own bullying by staying, and who thought in the end that there was only either the job or death?

As tragic as it was, Christine’s death was very much avoidable. And because it wasn’t, all parties are culpable including the victim herself.