Due to the generosity of my boss in Melbourne, my colleague and I will have 10am starts every day for the rest of this month. It means I get to take the later train and avoid the morning rush. And that’s sweet. Or it would have been if it wasn’t also school holidays right now.

I never realise how annoying teenagers speak these days. Every sentence ends and sounds like a question, and the word “like” is used like, a little too much? And man, the swearing. Did we use to swear so much? “Fucken” is used by teenagers as the universal adjective more and more. The language is so coarse that it hurts your ears if you listen to it too much. Fucken this, and fucken that. “Aw yeah, it was fucken good mate. You should have seen his fucken face. It was fucken awesome.” It’s like the word has lost, like it’s shock value?

Mind you, there are some interesting sights though. Like for example, the bogan moms with their mullet-haired babies; the prissy girls in their tartan coats holding handphones fancier than mine, being watched over by their equally prissy and high-maintenance looking of a mother; emo punk goths scaring the little old ladies sitting across of them; and tweens dressed as their favourite Bratz dolls making grown men squirm uncomfortably in their seats.

And since I love people watching, all of this is like just fucken rocks?! If only it wasn’t like so fucken noisy? That would have been even better, yeah?