It doesn’t matter how confident and secure you are in yourself, and it doesn’t matter if you like the person or not, everytime that you hear those words said about you, it has a jarring effect. What? Why? What’s wrong with me?
And if you happen to like the person, it’d obviously sting even more. For me though, I’d not want to know why. What’s more depressing than hearing those words is knowing things about yourself that you can’t change to make the other person think differently about you.
I guess my name has already popped up at some point in the past. But knowing this didn’t really faze me - it makes me actually want to just give it a shot anyway so that I can close the book on this. I rather that than leaving it middling in limbo.
My friends and I agree on the old cliche: better to try and fail, than to not try at all. Better to flame out than to not flame at all, I’d say. So, flame on!
We also agree on a compromise strategy. Knowing how she feels, we thought that asking her out directly would probably not help. To have the slim chance of her changing her mind about me, she has to see more of my natural self: relaxed, easy-going, confident and humourous. Heh. Therefore, the agreed approach is to have more group outings where the situation is not forced and there’s no pressure. And if the timing is right, it’s easier to broach the question and ask her out.
And after talking to my friends and writing this, my head is clearer and I’m less anxious because of it. I’m glad because there will also be more fun times ahead. Much as I don’t like the chase, it does make life interesting.
You know how when you meet that someone new and special, you start fantasising about things? You day dream about them doing the things that you like with you, going to your favourite places, meeting your close friends and your family? And you get all anxious over things that are only thoughts in your head at the moment?
Lately, I’ve found myself doing that a lot. Though it’s not over someone new; it’s over someone whom I’ve met a while back, and the thoughts and feelings have only just surfaced recently.
So I’m nervous and just a little bit scared. But I’m also excited and happy. And I’ve probably said a little too much on this blog that is read by friends.
Yesterday’s raving was most awesome. Not even the possibility of rain could dampen everyone’s excitement. This time round, the group of us that went was even larger. These are the friendly faces in my group.
The highlights for me were Kazu Kimura, Tydi, Sasha and Above & Beyond (seen below clockwise from left to right), ATB and Kid Kenobi.
As per usual for my event pics, here are the random punters …
… all except for AJ (bottom right) whom I’ve first met randomly whilst taking photos at Ministry of Sound Sessions Tour Perth 2006, and whom I’ve since bumped into at almost every major dance event that I’ve been to.
And here are some girls on shoulders.
Plus I got a free hug from these lovely bunch.
You can find more photos in their original sizes in my Flickr set.
And to cap off this post, here’s the now expected highlight clip. I must say, it’s very flattering and humbling to have random strangers (3 yesterday and more previously) still recognise and come up to me to say “hello” even though my last such clip was a year ago at Daft Punk. I think I’ve now found a good balance between taking photos and clips, and having fun. So perhaps I might pick this up again next year.
Anyways, here’s the clip (approx. 12 min, date typo in video). Happy raving!
Woo! Global Gathering yesterday was awesome. Above you can see the essentials for a day of fun and frivolity in a wide open space: sunglasses, sun screen, map and schedule times, a raincoat (it was forecast to rain) and my camera. Yes, my camera. The first time in almost a year that I’ve brought my camera to an event.
So, there are more photos and a video clip to come.
It’s not everyday that I get to see stories about three such outlandish and twisted crimes on the front page of a news site. And all with the same theme. Check them out.
A grandmother hacked her 71-year-old husband to death with a machete because she thought he was seeing other women, a court has been told.
Kamalavati Sundar, 70, pleaded not guilty in the Supreme Court jury in Brisbane today to murdering her husband Ram as he slept in their Woodridge home in December 2005.
Mr Sundar was found lying face-down in bed with at least 14 machete wounds to his head and the top of his arms, prosecutor Angus Edwards told the court, the Courier-Mail reports.
A 21-year-old man says he’s innocent of alleged sexual offences against a 10-year-old girl because the acts were consensual.
…
The magistrate responded: “It can’t be consensual if she’s a 10 year-old girl.”
This last one above, the seriousness of the case notwithstanding - I can just imagine the magistrate’s face when the accused said it was consensual. Hahah!
Porn is all about the fantasy and the self-projection of that fantasy isn’t it? So purely because of the exotic factor, I think there’s a huge untapped market that wants to see more Asian men in Western porn with non-Asian women.
Except there aren’t that many. In fact, I haven’t seen any myself.
The dearth of Asian men in Western porn was also touched on by Fleshbot in a profile they did of Keni Styles (NSFW), a London-based Asian male porn star.
Reverse fetishism, yeah?
For an interesting perspective on this, here’s a clip of porn star Sasha Grey (wiki) talking about this exact topic. She touches on possible reasons such as differences in cultural and moral values, but then immediately contradicts herself when she notes that there’s a lot of Asian women in Western porn. And she also dismisses the theory that it’s because of penis sizes. In the end, she admits that she doesn’t really know why there aren’t more Asian males in the US porn scene though she wouldn’t mind working with them.
Clip is SFW, unless the words “dildo”, “dick” and “penis” offend. Use earphones or turn it down low.
Well, chocolatesuze did the same thing and not only did she get 6 cans of Mother at first, but then four days later she received a whole slab of 24 cans more!!! Argh. I think it’s because she’s prettier than me.
We also agree on a compromise strategy. Knowing how she feels, we thought that asking her out directly would probably not help. To have the slim chance of her changing her mind about me, she has to see more of my natural self: relaxed, easy-going, confident and humourous. Heh. Therefore, the agreed approach is to have more group outings where the situation is not forced and there’s no pressure. And if the timing is right, it’s easier to broach the question and ask her out.
