It doesn’t matter how confident and secure you are in yourself, and it doesn’t matter if you like the person or not, everytime that you hear those words said about you, it has a jarring effect. What? Why? What’s wrong with me?
And if you happen to like the person, it’d obviously sting even more. For me though, I’d not want to know why. What’s more depressing than hearing those words is knowing things about yourself that you can’t change to make the other person think differently about you.
So yeah, I asked a mutual friend about her.
She says that you’re not her type.
I guess my name has already popped up at some point in the past. But knowing this didn’t really faze me – it makes me actually want to just give it a shot anyway so that I can close the book on this. I rather that than leaving it middling in limbo.
My friends and I agree on the old cliche: better to try and fail, than to not try at all. Better to flame out than to not flame at all, I’d say. So, flame on! 
We also agree on a compromise strategy. Knowing how she feels, we thought that asking her out directly would probably not help. To have the slim chance of her changing her mind about me, she has to see more of my natural self: relaxed, easy-going, confident and humourous. Heh. Therefore, the agreed approach is to have more group outings where the situation is not forced and there’s no pressure. And if the timing is right, it’s easier to broach the question and ask her out.
And after talking to my friends and writing this, my head is clearer and I’m less anxious because of it. I’m glad because there will also be more fun times ahead. Much as I don’t like the chase, it does make life interesting. 
8 Responses to ““You’re not her type””
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Goingout in a group and letting her see a relaxed side of you is certainly a good approach. Overtime, you can start building eye contact and all. Look out for exciting times ahead!
I’ve heard girls say that when they first met their boyfriend/husband, they thought he ‘wasn’t their type.’ But as they got to know him, they changed their mind. This doesn’t always happen (sometimes the chemistry never develops), but it has certainly been known to happen. Hang in there, and you never know where things will end up!!
blur ting: yeah yeah, I think so too! And yes more exciting times ahead. Meanwhile my eyes will still be roving.
girlstar7: hmm true that, I’ve heard that too but I’m naturally pessimistic. Yeah definitely won’t know where things will end up cos I’m damn sure will still keep my eyes wide open for new ventures. Hahah!
Moooi actually properly enough “in like” to care! Watch out pretty lady!
I reckon if two people (1) get along and (2) have some sort of non-platonic style attraction… the rest is all up to timing and damned good luck .. oh and how long is a piece of string
You seem decent enough dude and you’ve now got the added pulling pressure of being an almost home owner. In some circles mate, you’ve earned the right to pick and choose
Clara: good points all round! “In some circles …” – now all it takes is for me to find that circle. Hahah!
Actually, I’m kinda in the same situation. Thing is, that girl know that I like her, we are currently in the “be friends” stage while I am subconsiously courting her. Feel kinda weird. Hahaha.
For me, It’s I don’t want to have any regrets later part of my life for not doing the things I would done.
Lupin: just make sure you don’t get used in the process. Keep your eyes wide open.
[...] friends know about the situation with both. For now, because they know girl A had said that “I’m not her type“, the majority of them are encouraging me to go for girl B. Having seen us together, they [...]