Reading about the breakdown of Sassyjan’s relationship, one which had seemed to be going swimmingly relative to her previous one, was surprising. It also got me thinking about the saying,

‘Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.
From Alfred Lord Tennyson’s poem In Memoriam:27, 1850

Is it really? I don’t doubt the emotional high of being in love. It is awesome. If I have to compare it to something else, it is almost like taking ecstasy. You are incredibly happy, you can’t stop smiling, you have energy, music sounds better, food tastes better, and everything just feels right. If being in love was considered a narcotic, it will probably be illegal too.

But just like the drug, falling out of love has its own comedown. You are depressed, you can’t sleep, you lose appetite and nothing you do can get you out of the funk. It’s something that you have to let run its course, as painful and as uncomfortable as it is.

So my point is, if you’ve never gotten that high, then you wouldn’t have fallen so low. If your life was more of a plateau rather than a roller-coaster, is it really that bad? “It’s better to have loved and lost, than to not have loved at all” sounds like what someone would say to console themselves after a breakup.

It is also used by some to justify the need to be in a relationship all the time. They can’t bear to be alone but choose to disguise that fact by thinking themselves to be superior or more fortunate than those who haven’t experienced love.

Must one experience pain to know what true happiness is? Is life meaningful only if both highs and lows are experienced? I disagree. But then you already knew that from a previous post – I have said that I adhere to the Buddhism concept of The Middle Way.

Thomas Hawk @ flickr

Being on a roller-coaster is fun and exciting and we must all take a few metaphorical rides while we search for the one. But in the mean time, if you need to be on one constantly to be happy, then you’re just a love junkie.

(via Dorkly)

Hilarious. Language definitely NSFW.

The other day we were at a family do and I sat next to a bunch of Christians. I knew they were church goers from hearing them talk but they didn’t know that I wasn’t a Christian. I introduced myself and because they thought that I was their age (20s, haha) we started talking about uni, what we studied and what I’m working as.

A few courses of lunch later, the one next to me suddenly asked, “Do you go to church?” I said, “No, I’m a Buddhist.”

“Oh, so you go to a temple then?” she said. I said, “No, I don’t pray per se but I subscribe to most of the Buddha’s teachings. It’s logical to me.”

Normally, this is where I would expect the conversation to stop. Yeah I’ll go to hell for being a non-believer but just let me be!

She persisted anyway. “Do you know much about Christianity? Have you read the Bible?” I said, “I have and there are a lot of good stuff in the Bible which is true for all the major religions. But I don’t believe in some of the other stuff and that is why I can’t be a Christian.”

“Oh, like what?”, all of them asked almost instinctively.

“For example, the original sin. I don’t believe that babies can be born with sin, and I don’t believe that it is right for unbaptised babies to go to hell or limbo, if those places exist. I don’t believe a benevolent God would let good people suffer. I don’t believe in the one God or any God, I don’t believe in Adam and Eve, and where are the dinosaurs?”

I added that last bit to try to lighten up the conversation a little because I saw their faces scrunched up. Heh. Anyway, two of the Christians then took turns to tell me babies have sin because of what Adam and Eve did in the Garden of Eden, that God’s will may not seem logical to us but that’s because we are mere humans and we are not meant to understand all of it. Oh, and that there are dinosaurs in the Bible but they are called different things.

Exasperated, and also because I just want to continue eating my lunch in peace, I said, “I admire your faith in a God that behaves illogically, a faith which I don’t have. And if we were indeed created by Him, then I’m exercising the free will that he’s given us in not believing in Him. I mean, what’s the point of free will if we are not allowed to exercise it, right?”

I smiled, stuffed my mouth with a piece of sweet and sour pork and then chewed very slowly.