There’s a popular theory that women who are on their period are more flirty, dress more provocatively, and are more prone to cheating. Oh, and men supposedly find them more attractive too even if the women are not being overtly sexy. And it’s all because of all these subconscious cues that guys sense and pick up.
There are countless studies about it (google “ovulating women attractive”), probably because they can’t quite get the science of it down pat. It’s all very speculative but as pop psychology, it’s one of the more interesting ones to read about.
Anyway, there’s an article in The New York Times reporting on yet another study about this topic.
I’ll summarise some of the hypotheseses that it puts forth.
Single men rate ovulating women more attractive.
Ok ….
However, men in long term relationships rate them less attractive . They play a mind trick on themselves by thinking that she’s not that hot anyway – in order to supress the natural instinct to stray.
I call bull on this. An attractive woman is an attractive woman. If I’m in a long term relationship, I’d will myself not to stray but I would still find her attractive. Willpower, yes. Mind-tricks, no. A beautiful woman is a sight to be enjoyed. Just try to be discreet about it. Heheh.
Women who are ovulating are more prone to cheat, especially when they are with men whom they are not sexually attracted to. And these men are more prone to bouts of jealousy and “mate-guarding”.
Yeah, I can see this happening. But whether or not you can attribute this to a woman’s menstrual cycle is another thing. A girl would have more of a wandering eye if she’s not that sexually attracted to her current guy. And her guy will naturally get more jealous if he sees her acting more flirtatiously.
The article cited a related finding from another study: when you prevent your partner from checking out attractive members of the opposite sex, it makes them even more curious and makes them think about infidelity even more. Yup, that’s logical, can’t fault that.
Anyway, if these theories are true then every women that I know must be on their periods all the time because y’all are so damn beautiful.
You let me got close,
Too close,
But you weren’t really there,
You never were.
I saw what I wanted to see,
But I want to wake up now,
This dream is getting old,
And I’d rather you were real.
Above you see the famous Cathay Cinema in daylight. I think it’s prettier than in the night time.
Our hotel when we were in Shanghai was The New Westlake Hotel on Maoming South Road. We paid about 1500 RMB per night for a two-floor room with twin double-beds and two bathrooms/toilets. Well worth it. It was a bargain for my family of four. And very central.
This is the view outside our room. Nothing to look at really but I like the colonial feel of the area.
A short walk away …
… were a long stretch of little fashion shops. Was spoilt for choice – the range of stuff from high end to cheaper stuff was amazing.
In the heart of the city …
… we came across an area in a park where they put up actual marriage proposals, or marriage-wanted ads.
One side were for women-seeking-men and the other for men-seeking-women. On these ads, they advertise details such as age, height, weight, province of origin and even their monthly income.
And you also get these people – the parents of the future brides and grooms being like salespeople for their children, with flipbooks showing photos. It was all very surreal.
When we were in Shanghai, like everywhere else in China on this trip, we did a lot of walking. But I liked walking in Shanghai because it felt like Singapore to me, and I like Singapore.
And speaking of walking, I came across these shoes in a shop. You like, Sel?
I’m pretty surprised that I haven’t wrote about this more before, seeing as how it’s my modus operandi. Heheh. I’ve talked about the futility of persistence before but I didn’t elaborate on the specifics. I’ve said that you should not persist with a girl who is not reciprocating but I never said when is a good time to call it quits when you go after a girl. So here it is: 3 calls.
When I say 3 calls, it encompasses 3 real attempts in asking someone out. That can be face-to-face, Facebook, text-messaging, instant messaging and phone calls. Having said that, ideally the 3 calls should not be the only time that you are interacting with her. In between, there should at least be some harmless banter back and forth via the same mediums. Otherwise you’d come across as very abrupt and your chances of rejection are probably higher than if you’ve laid your foundations right first.
So you’ve seen each other around and you’ve talked a few times. Time to man up and go out on a limb – time to ask her out. And she says no. That’s cool. She has a life and she’s allowed to be busy. Sometimes, if she’s keen on spending some time with you, she might suggest alternatives. And that’s great. But more often than not, an alternative is not offered. This puts you in a grey area because this has only been the first call and you can’t really tell where this might be going yet. Nonetheless, you’ve now used up 1 out of 3 calls.
Call number 2 … after a week or so, maybe two, you give it another try. Again, she’s busy. Once is a probability, twice is a coincidence, but coincidences are allowed of course. Very rare are the occasions when the goodies are just given to you on a platter. You have to earn it my friend. However, alternatives were not offered. Again. It’s not looking too good at this point. But, you err on the side of being a love-sick puppy and believe in the coincidence. And anyway, giving up after just 2 calls is neither here nor there. Hah.
You play it cool. You see her online or in real life and you don’t bring up anything about taking her out. You even flirt a little. You give it a little more time. You don’t want to come across as desperate or needy. But you gotta know and soon it’s time for call number 3. And you get shot down one more time. So here we are: this is the point that you stop.
She’s made it very clear to you that she doesn’t want to go out with you at this point in time. Maybe she will change her mind, who knows. But right now, you should back off. By asking her out 3 times, you have already made your intentions known. Hopefully by doing so, you haven’t been placed in the friend zone just yet.
By backing off, this will prevent things from getting awkward and uncomfortable. By not being a psycho persistent stalker, there remains the chance of you revisiting this down the line too. At the very least, you can still be friends with her. It never hurts to have more female friends – it does good for the ego and it expands your social network which extends the pool of potential women to date.
V Iced Coffee with Guarana. Yes ladies and gentleman, this is an actual thing. Some food scientists must have been sitting around wondering what else can they do with energy drinks. They’ve added vitamins to it, they’ve taken the sugar out of it, they’ve made it taste fruitier, and they’ve doubled it in size and even shrunk it into little energy shots.
So they must have thought, what about THE original energy drink that more people on the planet consume than anything else, coffee? Brilliant! Why didn’t we think of this sooner? Let’s add guarana to it! Woohoo! \0/
Yeah it’s a pretty obvious idea but is it also indicative that they’ve run out of ideas? Never mind. Their ads suckered me into trying one anyway. So I went and bought a bottle from the supermarket to try. It cost $3.80 which is about the same as a can of Mother but a bit more than plain iced coffee. It has the same amount of caffeine as a can of Mother (~130mg), which is twice that of a regular 250mL can of Redbull. It doesn’t have taurine in it like Mother, but it does have guarana in it, about as much as a 250mL can of V.
Flavour wise, I’m pleased that it still taste like regular iced coffee. There’s no weird aftertaste. So the effects? On plenty of caffeine alone, I’d be quite jittery and although I get things done quicker, I tend to get distracted easily too. I am better with energy drinks in that I can concentrate better – could be the taurine and/or guarana, or it could be my imagination. So adding guarana to iced coffee has the same effect on me as a normal energy drink – I am wide awake and restless but I’m able to focus. The buzz kicked in after the first few sips and gradually subsided over the course of 2 hours. But I’m still wide awake now. And it’s been almost 9 hours. Hahah!
V has tried a coffee flavour before with their Black V. That one took a little getting used to but after a while, it tasted like a strong but waterry black coffee. And I give them credit for coming up with something new this time too.
Verdict? If you like iced coffee and you want an extra kick, try this drink out. But if you don’t feel like paying so much for flavoured milk or if you are lactose intolerant, then stick with the usual fizzy stuff. The end result is the same. Minus the added calcium and milky goodness.
Caught an ep of Rules of Engagement tonight and one storyline was about how men should just shut up and listen. You know, when a woman bitches and moans about a problem to you, she’s not seeking an answer or a solution – she just wants you to listen and understand.
Every guy who’s been in a relationship should know that already. But every guy who’s ever been in a relationship will also know why it’s always an effort to not offer your two cents.
As Jeff said in the episode,
You don’t bring a car to a mechanic and say, “Don’t fix it – just listen to it and give it a hug.” We fix it! It’s what we do!
