Here’s the setup: inattentive bad listener of a girlfriend does not realise that her boyfriend will be going to Europe for 2 weeks, even when told repeatedly. Boyfriend leaves for Europe but left his phone off because he didn’t want to pay high roaming charges. Then why bring his phone, you asked? That point is not important to the story. Or rather, it IS important to the story because this simple act would unleash the psycho bitch that was in the girlfriend all along when she tries desperately to get in touch with him and couldn’t.

Enjoy!

(via College Humor via JD’s Man Stories)

I was doing my sporadic cull of Facebook friends recently and one of the friends on my list is a girl whom I had a bad crush on 6 years ago. Nothing came out of it but before you think that I’m a sad delusional fool to have sent her a friend request in the first place, it wasn’t like that at all.

When I first saw her appear on Facebook, as I inevitably did when I started trolling through the profiles of friends of friends, I did not want to add her. At the time I knew she was getting engaged to be married and I didn’t want to torture myself by having to read her status updates or see photos of her with her fiance. I’ve made my peace about her a long time ago when I got rejected. It was good stumbling across her profile and photos because man, she’s quite the looker, but that was that. I gawked a little and then promptly forgotten about it.

Then I saw her friend request. On impulse I added her despite my earlier instincts not to. A few tepid messages were exchanged. A few comments here and there on things that she posted up and then it stopped. I think the last bit of electronic words which we had exchanged was more than 6 months ago.

So now here I am wondering whether or not I should remove her from my friends list. I thought about it for a while. Then I trolled through her photos once more and thought,

Hmm, ok next time. Maybe.

And thus she remains on my friends list. Men are visually stimulated, what can I say?

The day started with lunch at a McDonald’s, specifically a children’s birthday lunch. Hahah! Normally it’s Happy Meals all around but we chose to have items from the regular menu, and we had it inside the train next to the playground. Because we couldn’t fit in the playground, and we didn’t play any of the usual birthday games that the McDonald’s staff would put on, in the end we basically paid to have lunch in the train carriage.

But it was something different and it was my first McDonald’s birthday ever.

A few hours after lunch, we headed to Scott’s restaurant for the night time celebration. He made us really good food: we had fried wontons, chicken wings, beef curry with rice and an awesome beef soup.

After the meal, we had the second cake of the day.

Throughout the night, there was a lot of alcohol consumed. Woo! The success of the night were jugs of Chambord, a French black raspberry liqueur, mixed with lemonade and lime. That got everyone happy and easy going and then the drinking games started.

After a while, we gave up on the pretense of a game and just drank. Hah!

Which got us all even more hyper and crazy. The theme of the night was “Barbie is a SLUT!” which meant that most of us came in wigs and costumes. Which meant a lot of props to muck around with.

And naturally, all of us whipped out our cameras as a result.

It provided endless laughter.

I got in on the fun too. This was supposed to a spaceman James Bond with chicks kinda thing.

Happy birthday again Sel! It was a full on awesome day!

The above is a clip of cosplayers, people who dress up as cartoon, comics and video-game characters, listening to the Black Eyed Peas’ song “Imma Be” at the recent Comicon in San Diego. It’s awesome. The funniest thing is them reacting to the song in character.

(via Topless Robot)

John Hughes’ movies were a big part of my teenage years. Through fantasy and a keen sense of what teenagers go through, they offered a sense of hope and optimism that the ordeals of life and love is not as bad as one would think. And most of all they were funny.

Among movies like Pretty in Pink, Sixteen Candles, and Home Alone, my favourite John Hughes movies were Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, The Breakfast Club, Weird Science and Uncle Buck. Even those of his movies which were not predominantly about the tortured lives of teenagers like National Lampoon’s Vacation and Planes, Trains and Automobiles were great.

If I have to pick my favourite lines from a John Hughes movie, they would all be from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off:

Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?
Don’t worry about it, I don’t even have a piece of shit. I have to envy yours.
Life moves pretty fast. You don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.

And then there were the theme songs. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off had that infectious tune by Yello called “Oh Yeah” which was used in a lot of other movies, but I thought that it fit this movie the best.

Uncle Buck had Tone Loc’s “Wild Thing”.

Weird Science had … “Weird Science” by Oingo Boingo.

And fittingly to end this post, Simple Mind’s “Don’t You Forget About Me” from The Breakfast Club.

Thanks John! I could not have imagined my 80s without your movies.

I had to go and tempt fate today …

First half of the working day was great. I was breezing through my work, getting things done and answering and solving most of the problems presented to me. I stepped out for lunch and the sun was shining on a perfect Western Australian winter day: not too hot, not too cold, just very nice.

There I was chowing down on my favourite burger, a Double Bacon Deluxe, sitting by the window watching the crowd walking by. On the stroll back to the office, I lost count of the number of pretty girls that I walked past.

I was thinking to myself, “It can’t get any better than this. Man, I really really love Perth.” And I was smiling all the way back.

When I got back into the office, I immediately updated my Facebook status:

So in love with Perth some days that it’s unnatural.

Then I got a call from a customer who swore at me. Figures.

Tham, Simon and I had drinks last night. And when three single guys get liquored up, the conversation inevitably turns to women. The main thesis of the night was that in order to get a girl, our tolerance for bullshit has to be high. That no matter how nice the girl is, she will have her idiosyncrasies and most of them will be peculiar to the male brain.

Which is not to say that our wives and girlfriends don’t have to deal with our shit either. No one is perfect and so, bullshit tolerance is required from females too. Though here’s my thought on this: what if you don’t need someone to tolerate your bullshit? What if you don’t care enough about that to want to reduce the bullshit that you inflict on potential girlfriends? Or what if you don’t tolerate enough bullshit to withstand a relationship, such that you don’t expect someone to tolerate your bullshit in return, and so you subconsciously prevent a relationship from starting?

All of which describes how I have been in the past few years. I will get interested in a girl but the moment I spot a character flaw that I don’t want to put up with, I lose interest. So far in hindsight, I am glad that things have happened the way they did and how my sanity-preservation instincts had kicked in. How long I’d maintain this mindset I don’t know. Though maybe I should up my bullshit tolerance a bit more, just enough to get me laid perhaps. ‘Cos you know, it’s been a while.