I blame the parents


May 13, 2006 12:14 PM

It’s a tragic and unfortunate incident for a girl to get pregnant at 11 to a 15-year old boy because she may not know better. But when she also smokes 20 cigarettes a day and drinks regularly, then something is seriously wrong with her parenting.

This is the story of a British girl living in Edinburgh who started smoking at 9 and drinking at 10, and now pregnant at 11. When she gives birth to her baby at 12, she would be the youngest mother in Britain.

You cannot blame the government even though it’s easy. You cannot blame society either because as a parent, the kid is your responsibility and not anyone else’s. Here’s a crude analogy, if your dog goes out and bites someone where does the responsibility lie? You as the pet owner of course.

Here are two choice quotes from this story. From the girl:

“I can give up smoking at any time, but I don’t find it affects my pregnancy.”

And from the mother:

“I’m not ashamed of my daughter at all – in fact, I’m proud of her for keeping the baby.”

And therein lies the probable cause of this whole sorry saga. When the mother has no common sense about what’s right and wrong about this (proud ?!), how do you expect an ignorant 11 year old girl to know better?

Girl, 11, will be Britain’s youngest mother | the Daily Mail
BBC NEWS | UK | Scotland | Edinburgh and East | Boy charged over child pregnancy

(via MetaFilter)

15 thoughts on “I blame the parents

  1. blinkymummy

    i think pregnancy is the by-product of underage sexual intercourse. after that, there are 3 consequences, of which 2 are quite sad, i.e.

    (i) no pregnancy
    (ii) pregnant, then abortion.
    (iii) pregnant, then giving birth.

    and that, i think, is not uncommon.
    just that few actually give birth to the child or keep the child.

    actually, human beings have been having kids since they can, i.e. at very young age.
    it is social norms that make 12 an age that is ‘too young’ because of the meaning of parenthood in our current world order.

    sometimes i think it’s no diff whether the parent is a 12 yr old or a 24 yr old or a 36 yr old.
    some people stop progressing after a while anyway.

    shite… this is getting so long and bleak…
    i should just do it up as an entry on my blog.

    =)))

    Reply
  2. mooiness Post author

    BM: Getting pregnant is not the worst thing because as you’ve said, it was common for ppl in the middle ages to get pregnant around puberty. But it’s the smoking and the drinking that is just irresponsible.

    And yeah, I think there’s enough ideas in this post for your own. 🙂

    dio: true that, perhaps she was a teen mother herself? But having been through that, shouldn’t that mean she would want better for her child? The buck has to stop somewhere.

    But if all parties concerned – the girl and her mother, are ok with it, who are we to judge eh?

    Snowflake: yes unfortunately it is.

    Reply
  3. girlstar7

    I couldn’t believe this story when I heard it. I mean, who on earth has sex at the age of 11?? jesus christ. I thought it wouldn’t be possible to get pregnant at that age, or possible to have sex at that age. I guess she was an early developer.
    but I agree, what is even sadder than the fact that she was having sex aged 11 is that she was smoking and drinking from age 9-10. it is a vicious cycle, her mother probably had her first child very young and her own child is likely to have a similar story. but it is great when you hear of someone that has broken the cycle (i.e. come from these circumstances and still managed to get an education, a decent job etc.)

    Reply
  4. mooiness Post author

    girlstar7: I’m sure there are ppl who have broken out of the cycle, so blaming others rather than the parents is weak.

    CW: now that you mentioned it, holy smokes … uncanny! But sad at the same time.

    The V.U.: heh now that’s just cruel.

    Reply
  5. Greenie

    I agree on what you have wrote regarding on the ger mum, as to comment on her daughter action to be proud of. WTF!!..Proud?!?, pardon mi, who will actually condone such behaviour. Well, getting the baby into the world is an easy thing but what abt sustaining the tiny life, not asif you delivery the kid and u can juz dump it aside. Its like any creatures need to be feed and teach them the skills to survie. Like what BM mention in her blog, this world is no longer hunter-gather society anymore. There much much much more you need equi to survive in today WORLD. I.e, spending 15 yrs of education to get an decent job. What the damn HELL, did the teenage ger know about $$, money dont fall from the sky, ger!! Well, unless u came from an well educated family and is loaded, which they can help to take care of ur child. But again, i truely believe the habitat u’re breed in simply defines whether if u can be gd breed or bad breed.

    Reply
  6. mooiness Post author

    Cynthia: a vicious cycle but it has to be broken somehow.

    Greenie: environment does matter a lot in shaping a person, but surely the mother can see that the situation that she and her daughter are in, isn’t the ideal? Oh well.

    Reply
  7. $$$$

    *sigh*

    Well, environment and such can be changed. How is it that everyone’s talk about upbringing and other factors but no one note that it takes courage to just proceed on.

    Who knows? Maybe they live a happier life. The girl grow more responsible after having the child. And life just get better.

    I promote hope, even if it takes a miracle.

    Wish them well, people.

    Reply
  8. sourrain

    This has not come as a suprise to me..as per my earlier blog

    http://sourrain.blogspot.com/2006/03/and-you-call-us-third-world-country.html

    We will soon have a battalion of 11 year old mothers walking around.When everyone else is getting a paper route to get extra pocket money,they are popping out tots so that the taxpayers can pay for their cigarettes..suckers like me who pay taxes to help this little girl buy her fags so it can harm her baby…hell, I can’t even afford to buy fags for myself!!!

    Reply
  9. mooiness Post author

    $$$: you gotta be kidding if you think having a kid automatically makes you more responsible. This is a behaviour that ppl should not encourage. Courage yes – to break out of the cycle, and not to repeat the mistakes of her mother, but not to plow ahead into a disaster when you already know it’s a disaster.

    sourrain: No but yeah but no but …. you are right, it’s a terrible situation. Why in the world they would think that it’s a smart thing to do is beyond me.

    Reply

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