My Most Emotionally Satisfying Relationship

September 21, 2006 7:16 PM

My most emotionally satisfying relationship was with a woman whom, despite the strong emotional connection, I did not have sex with. And it lasted a mere 6 weeks.

I met her at Metro like how I met a lot of other women. Heh. I couldn’t remember how but I happened to be there by myself. In walked a bunch of people whom I know, and she was with them. Straight away there was a connection between her and I because we just started talking like we’ve known each other for a long time.

She was visiting from Thailand and she was going to be here for 6 weeks. As soon as I realise that she was only here for the short term, I zoned out right away. Must have been a reflex action to prevent myself from getting hurt. However, that didn’t stop us from really enjoying each other’s company.

Over the next few weeks, we’d see each other 2-3 times a week. We’d have dinner and drinks, and we’d go clubbing. We exchanged gifts and did small errands for each other. People did mistake us for being a couple because if you cancel out the sex, that’s what couples mostly do right?

Wong Kar Wai's
Wong Kar Wai’s “In The Mood For Love”

I would find out that she’s from a rich family and her father was a general in the Thai army. They have a big holiday home here and she drives a nice car. I even fantasised about being her gigolo – that’s how rich they were. But the great thing about her was that she didn’t have an air of arrogance or privilege. It just felt so easy being around her, and it felt very good.

In hindsight, I wonder if the reason that I think the relationship to be emotionally satisfying was because it felt so easy? Neither of us were looking for a relationship, and we were just enjoying the time that fate had given us. 6 weeks is nothing in the bigger picture. At the time it felt too short but simultaneously it felt so fulfilling.

Was I in love and didn’t know it? Hmm, I wonder.

[tags]single life, relationships[/tags]

18 thoughts on “My Most Emotionally Satisfying Relationship

  1. sourrain

    Fantasy is always better than reality.

    Was it because you had no time to fight/disagree on anything due to time constraints and were you in love with that idea more than the idea that she might lay in bed every night farting away?

  2. Otto

    Perhaps it is easier to keep up with a good front for six weeks and more difficult to keep it up for ten years?

    With such a short time line, your brain skips all the bad bits, concentrating on all the nicer ones… because you have so little time… It is logical after all. You have 6 weeks, you either spend it happy or bicker on small issues.

    Which then leads us to the cliche, “Live each day like it’s your last”.

  3. sourrain

    I just don’t want you to compare any future relationship with that one perfect moment..:P

    Its like guys comparing pornstar bodies with the girl next to you at work complete with that extra 10lbs and crooked teeth.

    Aiya,I’m just bitter. I think it’s great that you’ve had what you/some/me might call a perfect synergy.And you should never settle for less ,now that you know what your perfect synergy is.


  4. Irene

    i’d like to think it was because it was companionship, pure and simple. no chance to complicate it with all those disagreements and resulting negative connotations associated to the relationship itself.

    but hey, good luck to you on finding a woman who you might want to share your together with, and who fulfills you emotionally much in the same way. =)

  5. virgin_undergrad

    DUDE! You could have been the consort of a daugther of a supreme military leader!!!

    Nair mind, i’m sure there’re still many conniving generals out there with eligible daugthers just waiting to launch the next coup…there is still time 😉

  6. mooiness Post author

    sourrain: thanks for keeping me grounded! I heart you! 😛

    irene: yes correct. No time to explore the negatives when all we focused on were the positives. As for finding the next woman that will fulfill me the same way, fingers crossed eh? 😉

    v.u.: hahaha! yeah man! What are the odds of me meeting another daughter of another Thai general in Perth!? Heh.

  7. mooiness Post author

    ian: precisely – no expectations, no time to really see the “other” side of the person, and also the willingness to just enjoy the time we’ve got without thinking too much.

    Yeah, all that. 🙂

  8. Rob

    do you still keep in touch with her? its rare to find a connection like that. you gotta pursue it.
    remember what buddha says.
    if you don’t try, then you’ve already failed.

  9. girlstar7

    I had something similar with a guy. I met him out at a club one night, and I gave him my number. a few days later he called and we arranged to go on a date. at the start of the date he told me he lived in Alice Springs (I live in Melbourne) and that he was only down for a couple of weeks visitng friends. instantly I thought ‘okay this cant’ go anywhere, I can’t get attached’.
    but those few hours we spent together on that date, we just really connected. we had SO much in common plus a strong physical attraction. despite knowing it couldn’t really go anywhere, I still got involved, thinking ‘may as well give it a go and have no regrets’.
    what started was two weeks of great fun. we saw each other pretty much every day (it was in the summer, and I was on uni break and a break from work). we did fun things like going to the aquarium, going to the beach, playing tennis and going bowling. we had the best time together, I can honestly say they were two of the best weeks of my life!
    when he left, I found myself devastated. we kept in contact for a while, and hooked up once again when he came back to Melbourne, but eventually lost contact. who knows if it would’ve worked out as a ‘real’ relationship, but it sure felt good while it lasted. sometimes I STILL think about him even though I’ve had two long term bfs since him (including the one I’ve got now). sometimes I wonder where he is and if it wouldve worked out, but maybe it’s best being the romantic idea in my head of being so perfect without reality or the real world spoiling anything 🙂

  10. Otto

    That’s why there is the cliche, “Live each day like it’s your last”… The philosophy makes you appreciate the best and overlook the worst, thus having a great time and the illusion of “satisfaction”.

  11. mooiness Post author

    Rob: we kept in touch for a while but gradually drifted apart due to work and distance.

    girlstar7: yes, everything you said! As I’ve said, the reason that we remember it so fondly is because we didn’t overthink it and just went with the flow.

    Otto: in another words, ignorance is bliss. 🙂

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