What if your boyfriend became ugly?

December 5, 2006 7:30 PM
Faceless, love forever - Furry Omnivore at deviantArt
by furryomnivore @ deviantART
Chinese characters say “love forever”

I heard from my mom about a distant family friend who had made himself a hermit. A couple of years back, he had started to develop this rash on his skin. Though at the time, it was isolated on his back and it was presumably under control with medication. Apparently, it has now spread throughout his body. It had gotten so bad that he’s not willing to come out and face people anymore.

And to top it all off, his girlfriend left him. I’m vague about their history and I am not going to judge. My question to you is this: what if your boyfriend became ugly? Or if you are a guy – your girlfriend. Would you leave them? Think you are not shallow? Well, how about in this case?

I can’t even begin to imagine how the guy feels. But I can imagine how his girlfriend felt. Even if she had turned blind, she could still feel the irregularities on his skin. And she can’t bring herself to continue on.

However, even if she wasn’t disgusted by his physical appearance, the relationship was doomed anyway. It wasn’t going to survive with him locking himself up in the house. So is love enough? Probably not. As noble as we like to think ourselves to be, reality still matters. And it’s a bitch.

Which brings me to this: be thankful for the little things in life. Sam de Brito puts it even better:

It’s easy to get caught up in the grand chase of accumulation that we’re told marks our success as humans on this planet; to always be wanting more, instead of sitting back and thanking the ether for how damn lucky we are to live in this country, be safe, eat daily, drink a beer if we want.

Gratitude is a good habit to get into because all of us, no matter who we are, have something to be thankful for, whether it’s just being able to walk on two legs or see our friends’ faces with two working eyes.

Because you don’t know how lucky you are.

[tags]life, relationships[/tags]

16 thoughts on “What if your boyfriend became ugly?

  1. Fr0g^__^

    girlfriend or boyfriend? hmm..maybe it is hard to get one, not to say there isn’t any in this world.

    However, i dun “buy it”, so that make me a shallow one…

    Well, I only believe parent’s love and family’s love will be there for you.


  2. explicist

    man, good sharing… I found myself stucked asking the same question while reading your entry. but life’s full of unpredictable things… we really don’t know what we’d do for our loved ones. no?

  3. sourrain

    his gf probably left him because he became a hermit, and was probably really frustrated/angry/sad/afraid….basically his personality changed as well and he was not the same person she fell in love with. He had two choices after becomming ‘disabled’ so to speak; throw caution in the wind and remain himself or do not leave home. Maybe he’s the one whom this question should be asked; are looks so important that he is so embarrased..enough to change yourself and = gf leaving you.

    people leave relationships for different reasons…and most of the time, looks are only used as an excuse for an exit;i.e. my wife’s so fat she suffocates me,therefore i have a couple of mistresses on the side.in reality,

  4. mooiness Post author

    BM: we never want to contemplate it until it really happens to us.

    mf: oh yeah it does.

    frog: so in the end, parents/family over lover. Hopefully he is consoled that way.

    explicist: we won’t know it until push becomes shove.

    sourrain: hmm good point. does your comment go on, or did you just use the wrong punctuation? πŸ˜‰

  5. passerby

    it’s hard telling the difference between being grateful and being complacent sometimes. if we don’t get what we want, we will become unhappy. and being unhappy couldn’t be right, because we should be grateful for the little things in life. but by using this as a way to lighten up the situation, are we letting ourselves getting away with being complacent? i guess it’s a very simplistic way of looking at things, but sometimes trying to hard to be grateful could make a person who doesn’t want to be grateful in the first place end up being very bitter.

  6. girlstar7

    “Because you don’t know how lucky you are”
    SO true
    I have been through some tough times this year as I’ve mentioned to you before. It’s just been one of those years where a lot of things have gone wrong for me. I’ve lost a job, suffered from the the death of a very close family member, and dealt with a major relationship break-up. There have certainly been days where I think, ‘god how can I get through another day.’ I have felt pretty crap, I must admit.
    But I have developed a technique to look on the bright side. I could be living in a worn-torn country watching people die in front of my face. I could be living somewhere where I don’t even know where my next meal comes from. I could be seriously disabled, or terminally ill. There are so many people so much worse off than me out there and in the end, I’m pretty lucky.
    Sometimes that’s how you gotta look at things in life. Put things in perspective. I feel sorry for the guy in your story. But in the end, you can’t spend too long feeling sorry for yourself. You gotta get out there and live life, because in the end, there’s a hell of a lot to live for πŸ™‚

  7. sourrain

    actually…it was at the point when i lost the plot completely…so in reality, i lost the plot lor.

    girlstar is right. I was having a conversation with Bacon yesterday, regarding that now I had seen how his father treat him, I appreciate my parents so so much more. Things that you take for granted all seem so significant when you see what other people go through.In reality..

    (just kidding:))

  8. mooiness Post author

    passerby: you lost me there. Being grateful does not necessarily mean being complacent. It just means knowing that you are luckier than a lot of ppl.

    girlstar7: it’s all about perspective. And I think once you have that, anyone can be a much happier person.

    sourrain: ok you are also talking about perspective, I think. Hahah. You really lost the plot.

  9. Pingback: Mooiness! » The year that was - my 2006, part 2

  10. andi

    haha wow idk what i’d do, because my boyfriend just got a really crappy haircut..and i’m thinking about dumping him! ha wtf would happen if he had gotten a skin rash? wow i’m really shallow.

  11. shallow

    my boyfriend has never had a gf before and hes not that cute but hes really sweet we just started going out and im getting alot of crap from my friends because he isnt that “hot” i really dont care but its hard REAL HARD. im confused. i dont want to break his heart cause hes liked me for 2 whole years. this stupid story doesnt HELP!!!!!!!


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