What I don’t want in a woman

March 20, 2007 7:12 PM

I find it hard to nail down exactly what I want in a woman. However, I do know what I don’t want in a woman. I don’t want:

  • A clingy woman. I don’t want a woman who needs to see and be around me every single minute that she’s awake. I don’t want a woman who needs me to call her every hour when I’m out, just to let her know that I’m alright.
  • A woman whose emotional health depends on the relationship completely. I prefer co-dependence rather than a total dependence.
  • A woman who seeks self-validation from me, and also from the relationship. I don’t want her to ask me, “Do you think I’m prettier than her?” all the time. I prefer a woman who is confident and comfortable in her skin even before she met me.
  • A jealous and insecure woman. I have female friends and I like having them around. I don’t want to feel guilty every time that I see or talk to them. I also like looking at pretty women. All of which doesn’t mean that I don’t want to be with her.
  • A woman who expects me to do all the hard work in the relationship, and if something bad happens, would always put the blame on me. I need and expect the relationship to be reciprocal, and I hate double-standards.
  • A woman who doesn’t take pride in her appearance.
  • A woman who treats food as the enemy. I love to see a woman enjoying her food, in moderation of course. I think a healthy appetite is sexy.
  • An indecisive woman. She has a mind so she should use it. I don’t want to be making all the decisions. We are meant to be a team.

Good luck to me. 😛

A collage of me and women


24 thoughts on “What I don’t want in a woman

  1. van

    it sounds like u had a bad spell with girls my man.

    why is everyone wishing u good luck? lots of girls are like that? i mean we’re all pretty modern and forward thinkers, i mean it’s not like ure going to be dating a high school girl or some girl from i dunno…some kampung, who expects u to marry her once u have sex with her. 🙂

    i look at pretty men too 🙂 my boyfriend usually jumps around in front of me to make me pay attention to him, not the hottie across the street. =)

  2. mooiness Post author

    Michelle: heheh thanks!

    van: they are wishing me luck because there are many girls who are like that, so unless I’m willing to compromise on a point or two, it’s gonna be difficult for me to meet someone who’s the opposite of the above points.

    Still, I don’t think I need to apologise for not wanting those things – I don’t think any sane person, male or female would want them in their partners. Small doses – maybe, but not to the way that I’ve described it.

  3. robin

    I totally agree on the first point, I dislike girls being too clingy on guys, seriously, we need to breathe !!! I have mentioned about it on one of my blog entries before too, and I really prefer a girl that does not need to call/sms or check on me every 15 minutes !!

  4. sourrain

    hmm looking back I think the hardest might be the self-validation point – being thought as beautiful by your other half is nessacary.

    Sure, she might’ve had total confidence that she’s hawt, but being told that she is helps:). Its like, if we (your readers) keep telling you you are damn smokin hot,you like or not??!!

    like leh…

    but….shit man, good luck wei..you might need it!

  5. mooiness Post author

    dreymer: thanks!

    Robin: give us the link – we all love reading about that kinda stuff here. 😀

    sourrain: ok self-validation in that sense is ok (of course I’d love it!) but if she keeps asking for it time and time again, it can get annoying fast.

    march: thanks for the high praise! 🙂

  6. sourrain

    I think i pwetty

    do u think im pwetty?

    am i pwetty? har har?

    im pretty aren’t i?

    pretty or not?

    you dont think im pretty huh?

    you must think im ugly:(

    I cannot compare with your girl friends

    you dont love me anymore:(

    okbai *jumps off bridge*

  7. girlstar7

    Yeah, I can totally understand your list. There are plenty of women out there who aren’t clingy, needy, insecure etc. I’m sure you’ll find one and good luck!
    BTW there are also plenty of MEN who fit your criteria. I’ve never dated any, thank god, but my friends have dated guys who:
    won’t let them even look at other guys
    won’t let them have male friends
    will read through their phone
    will call once and if the girl doens’t pick up keep calling for the next hour, every five minutes

    so not only women are like this, it goes both ways, you are just more likely to encounter the females (consider you’re not gay!!)

  8. Rachel

    i am sooo not that. *shudder* I also wouldn’t want my girlfriends to be needy, jealous or insecure. Guess I am too much of a vainpot and a smart ass to have insecurity issues. 😉

    But I might be guilty of some thing though. I like to tell my guy that I love him. in many different ways. a little cuddle here, a hug there, a little kiss. A bit overkill sometimes. Hahaha.

  9. DeV|LisH

    Ah well it’s not hard since i myself already fit most of the point haha but honestly rite? i still think that in a r/ship it’s best to get someone with the same interest that would be fun. To enjoy doing the same thing together. But of cos not all the time la like i said clingy is BAD haha anyway ALL THE BEST OF LUCK

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  13. Becca

    My god you’re pretty idealistic! Yep there’s women who are what you require: gorgeous, confident, good in conversation, good in bed, but they aren’t just some damned dream list!

    Now tell me: How many of those girls in that collage aren’t friends of friends, introduced at work or sorta (be honest) people who can’t say no? Or, when you tell them about your blog and when they’re on this start cringing and avoiding your calls?

    Call the whole of the female population fickle, but we do really like it when its the boys who come ask us out. (and cue playing with hair and flirting) Be a man, you know you aren’t one when you’re too offended or scared to leave this up.

  14. mooiness Post author

    Becca: thanks for dropping by. I think you were implying by your question that I don’t approach women whom I don’t know? Some of the women in the collage are ones whom I’ve met on my own, ie. by chance and randomly.

    And I don’t really understand your last paragraph?


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