Real Life Barney Stinson


August 2, 2008 3:12 PM

The cast of How I Met Your Mother

One of my favourite shows on TV is “How I Met Your Mother“. The show spins a comedy around the relationship issues of a group of friends in their early 30s where two of them are married and the other three are single. The dynamics of their discussions are always fun because everyone has a different point of view due to their personalities and circumstances.

So apart from the married couple, one’s the straight-guy (as in follow the rules, have morals etc.), one’s a woman with all that that entails, and the other is the sleazoid player. And he’s called “Barney Stinson” and is played by Neil Patrick Harris.

He’s my favourite character on the show because he utters lines like these:

  • Because we just hooked up last night. I can’t call the girl the next day, I have to wait at least like…forever, Oh Snap! Nevergonnacallher.
  • This better be good. I’m about to enter Nirvana. By the way I should get you Nirvana’s phone number, she gives a great massage. Say whaaaat?
  • You invited me up to your apartment to play Battleship. Is that not an international recognized term for sex?
  • There are only two reasons to date a girl you’ve already dated: Breast implants.
  • This girl is blinding you with her shiny hair and boob-shaped boobs.
  • Look around Lily, you are in the heart of bachelor country. And as a woman you are an illegal immigrant here. Now you can try to apply for a sex visa but that only last 12 hours. Fourteen if you qualify for multiple entry.
  • Wherever girls want to get back at their ex-boyfriends we’ll be there. Wherever women deal with their daddy issues through promiscuity and binge drinking, we will be there. Wherever a bachelorette party drives through the city in a limo sticking their heads out of the windows yelling ‘What’s up New York?.’ We will be what is up New York.
  • Bringing a date to a wedding is like taking a deer carcass on a hunting trip.
  • The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she’s 17 years, 11 months old.

Barney's Hot vs Crazy rule

Sources:
How I Met Your Mother : Watercooler : TV : Entertainment : Sympatico / MSN
TV.com Forums – Favorite Barneyisms (comment 35)
Channel Guide Magazine » How I Met Your Mother: “The Goat” Recap

Other Barneyisms in the show include the “Bro Code” (one of which is that one should never make eye contact in a “devil’s three way”), and the “Lemon Law” (you are allowed to cut a date short within 5 minutes of the date if it sucks).

For more hilarity, check out Barney Stinson’s blog. 😀

The other night I met this guy who immediately reminded me of Barney. How I know? Because he mentioned a get together like so, “it’s the birthday party of the girl that I’m banging”. Heh. In a way, I wish I could be more like this guy, more like Barney. I wished I could be more thick-skinned when it comes to women, and base it all around “going for the percentage”.

Though as funny as Barney and this guy is, and as true as some of their theories about women and relationships are, I can’t because I don’t see the point of being a player. I don’t feel the need to try and score every time that I go out, and I am not afraid that my “skills” will fade away if I don’t use it.

Though the guy and I did agree on one thing: older girls are easier because they know what they want, and if you’ve got what they want, it’s a sure thing if you play it right; there’s less mind games and it’s less of a mind-fuck. Well, usually anyway. 😉

13 thoughts on “Real Life Barney Stinson

  1. mooiness Post author

    herman: heh yes having a wingman like Barney would make life very interesting.

    Kitty: hmm you got a point. And now you’ve made me depressed. Hahah!

    Dina: yeah it’s got some of the most realistic and funny dialogue on TV, so Tivo it!

    Reply
  2. Dabido

    And to think, Neil Patrick Harris is gay in real life. So it’s sort of funny he plays a player. 🙂

    Yeah, older women do know what they want, and after they’ve extracted your balls they quite often want sex as well. 🙂

    I don’t have to worry about my “skills” fading. I’ve never had skills in my life! 🙂

    Kitty – Older girls are less of a mind fuck than younger girls as they [younger girls] often don’t know what they want and often don’t realising what their indecision are doing to the guy. Yes, older women know how to mind fuck a guy, but the really annoying thing about the younger ones is they don’t know they’re doing it. 🙂 It all comes across as games to the guy, but at least an older women means it when she mind fucks him! 🙂

    Reply
  3. mooiness Post author

    Jamie: suit up! … Ted, why aren’t you suited up?!

    Fredison: yeah great storylines and really funny dialogue.

    Dabido: yup, NPH is kinda awesome that way. Heh. As for older women extracting your balls and then wanting sex? That sounds kinky.

    Reply
  4. Katie

    I love that show! And Neil Patrick Harris is an amazing actor … since he’s gay in “real life”! He is my favourite character, followed closely by Lily. You have good taste in shows 😉

    Reply
  5. mooiness Post author

    girlstar7: thursday 7:30pm channel 7 – watch it!

    chocolatesuze: yeah but Captain Hammer was funnier in that one. Heheh. “These are not the hammer. … the hammer is my penis.” :mrgreen:

    Reply

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