Just shut up and listen

November 4, 2008 8:37 PM

When a woman is telling you her problems, she doesn’t necessarily want to hear your solutions to them. Most of the time, she already knows what she has to do; she just needs to vent. Furthermore, women think differently from men.

At times, a woman’s thoughts are governed more by emotions and may seem illogical to us. And some would say that they are better lateral thinkers. In any case, a woman does not need to hear your attempt at a logical solution because you are not viewing the problem like she is. She just needs you to listen.

And why is this a good idea? Because looking bored, or getting caught pretending to be interested is better than arguing back and forth about a problem that wasn’t yours to begin with. 😛

24 thoughts on “Just shut up and listen

  1. sourrain

    I think what you need to do is just think about totally irrelevant things like what you’re having for dinner – that way your brains are still working and you look remotely interested 🙂

    I must say, there’s nothing worse than a man coming in and trying to solve the problem with their practical thinking. Damn annoying..:P

  2. Kitty

    pretending to listen is always good… your “orhs” are relatively well placed. The *nods* and “uh huhs” are always good practice too.
    and i’m qualified to say that on all counts. *giggle*

  3. mooiness Post author

    BigZ: breasts and cleavage are only for glancing at. You’re asking for more trouble if you stare. Heh.

    Sarah: heheh thank you thank you! Comes from years of experience and women magazines!

    Lupin: word!

    sourrain: hey that’s a good technique. thanks for the tip!

    Kitty: woohoo! thanks for the endorsement and approval! Hahah!

  4. girlstar7

    Wow, you really do understand women well!! Well said, I hope more men out there are reading this!
    I find that in some situations I really do need advice and it is welcomed. But in these cases, I usually specifically ASK i.e. I need some advice, I don’t know what to do. However, in other situations I really do just need to VENT! In which case it is SOooooo annoying if someone tries to give you logical advice!

  5. Katie

    Very true. In fact, the other night I got very emotional over the stupidist thing simply because I’ve been working really hard lately and I’m very tired. Phill was perfect – he listened, he hugged me and made me laugh. Just what I needed, rather than the usual argument over how silly I was being!

  6. mooiness Post author

    girlstar7: heheh but yeah, sometimes you’d like us to take you literally and other times you want us to read between the lines.

    Lupin: it’s not just that we never learn, but women are always changing too.

    Katie: listening and just being there takes less energy. 😉

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